Yesterday, the school guidance counselor pulled my kids out of class and gave them all IQ tests.
"Their academic performance indicates that they are strong candidates for the gifted program," the woman told me a few days ago on the phone.
"I am so mad at you for making me take that test," snapped Kellen when I picked him up from school.
I pretended not to know what he was talking about.
"The guidance counselor showed me the papers that you signed," he sneered.
"I answered all the questions wrong on purpose!" barked Cortlen. "And I got up to use the bathroom seven times during the test."
"Well done," I replied.
"I do enough work at school," Camber complained. "Why would I want to do more?"
She made a good point.
Early this morning, the guidance counselor called me with the results of the exam.
According to the test rubric, Camber and Cortlen have below average intelligence.
Kellen is bored out of his mind at school, but he probably doesn't notice because according to the IQ test, he only has three brain cells.
I seriously don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Laugh. What else can you do? Besides yell...? :)
ReplyDelete:( if only they knew!
ReplyDeleteYep - just laugh! And it sure made me smile!! It sounds something like what my kiddos would do!
ReplyDeleteThis totally reminds me of myself in 2nd grade. I didn't want to be considered a "nerd" so I would spell words wrong on purpose to be knocked out of the running for the district spelling bee. What? You don't spell crayon with a K?
ReplyDeleteLOL! Laugh . . . your children are secure in themselves -- and you. And clever. Well done.
ReplyDeleteyour life is so crazy. (i mean that in the best possible way) i can't believe some of these stories! it's highly entertaining. (probably not always for you though...)
ReplyDeletei think the fact that your kids were smart enough to know to throw a test proves just how smart they are.
thank you for sharing all your stories...i don't always comment, but i read them every time you post.
hahahaha, answering the questions wrong on purpose. love that.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter did the same thing. She didn't want to be in the class and do all the extra work! I'm kinda glad because that means extra work for me!!
ReplyDeleteToo funny. My three were just accepted into the gifted program at our school. After one day, my boys (also twins) were ready to drop out because of the extra work. "We work hard enough already!" Too bad for them they didn't think to blow the test like your kids!
ReplyDeleteLOL And that is classic gifted child behavior. And another reason why they should give individualized IQ tests, not the paper tests.
ReplyDeleteWell unfortunately for them... the "gifted" classes always get to do the coolest, most fun projects! I was jealous of them until 5th grade when they put me in... and it was the best! The gifted kids got to be taken out of class to do cool stuff while the rest of the class stayed and had to listen to the teacher drone on.
ReplyDeleteLOL -- I was like Sami, except I remember just filling in those little ovals in #2 pencil to make cool patterns on the test paper - never even reading the questions.
ReplyDeletea.b.c.d.e.d.c.b.a. Cool!
Wow. They're smart enough to foil that test! LOL.
ReplyDeleteI think I'd opt for laughing to tell the truth. (And besides, you know your kids aren't dummies anyway.)
ReplyDeleteLaugh till you cry. There's really no point in gifted programs (the ones with extra projects and lectures) until they are 4th or 5th grade. It would mean more work for you than for them anyway. And remember they wanted to kick Einstein out of grammar school because they thought he was mentally handicapped.
ReplyDeleteI was in a "gifted" program in eighth grade and hated it because I would have rather spent that time with my friends. The only time it really matters is if they are taking honors classes in high school. Those can look good to colleges - but only if they are also well-rounded people.
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong, gifted classes have their place in this world to keep some kids from being overly bored and doing poorly, but if your children are bored and still receiving good grades, I definitely wouldn't worry about it and laugh it off! :)
I used to make patterns in the bubble-sheet tests they would give us in high school (we had at least one every year, and sometimes two or three). It was far more entertaining than just taking the tests the way I should have.
ReplyDeleteOh, and dido what Ashley said. I think it's a little ridiculous that they have gifted classes for kids who don't seem to be acting up or failing due to boredom. It's more presumptuous than anything else.
ReplyDeleteJust laugh.. my son did the same thing last year. His teacher told me she was recommending him to be tested and he came home one day to tell me they pulled him out. I asked how the test was.. he said it was SO STUPID.. it was easy math and he already knew how to do it, so he didn't think he needed to learn anything new. I asked if he answered the questions and he said he answered some and then turned over the paper and started to draw. Yeah.. he didn't make the gifted class either.
ReplyDeleteI was hoping you would post this story. Perfect.
ReplyDeleteDude call back that counselor and rip her a new one! She should have known better!
ReplyDeleteAsk that the kids be retested but inform her using VERY SMALL WORDS that your children are orally opposed to anything which remotely smells of celebration of intelligence. Have them tested during their regular classes or something and tell them it's so they can have less homework or something. dupe 'em right back!
Another reason to love our schools here - no tracking/gifted until 3rd grade at the earliest!
ReplyDeleteAs an enrichment teacher, I'd have to say that if the school knew what they were doing...
ReplyDeletefirst of all, the teacher would be clued in that there's more to your kids than meets the eye.
next, someone should be working with their teachers to help make sure they weren't bored in the classroom to begin with.
and finally, enrichment programs shouldn't be about more work, they should be about DIFFERENT work. sometimes people just don't get that. sigh.
I agree with Lainie. The enrichment programs should be about different work.
ReplyDeleteMy son was skipped ahead in math in 2nd grade (it was a small private school with no gifted program so all they could do was advance the kiddos) to 3rd grade math. Just having that 1 more challenging class made school bearable for him. First grade was absolute MISERY for him and me.
Now he's at a school that lets him learn at his own level and doesn't hold him back with his "grade level". I no longer have to drag him out of bed in the morning to go to a place he hates. He gets up by himself now.
My youngest child (7th)in 2nd grade was put in for a gifted program where the kids were bused to another location on Wednesdays. But she loved her own class so much she refused to go and I refused to put her in it. It's ALOT of extra work. Her teacher told me Privately that often the kids who go into the gifted programs become so bored with school that they have a hard time in High School, despite their great intelligence. Some gifted programs are ok - if the regular teacher doesn't load the "missed work" on the gifteds. These days most teachers have so much going on in the classroom there isn't a need for "extra stimulation." You really have to look at your children's classrooms to decide if you want them to leave and go to another program for part of the school day.
ReplyDeleteI love the way the kids handled the situation; like pros.
ReplyDeleteHidden observations would assuredly point out that the tests were inaccurate. I'm sure the apples in your family do not fall too far from the tree!!
I feel pain for you. KIDS!
ReplyDeleteAll testing should be banned...I"m sorry but more often than not, they label a kid, causing teachers, parents, friends, and everyone else who reads their file to label, doubt, worry, catagorize, limit and fret, about something that is very likely untrue!!!!
ReplyDeleteKids are an artform, not a science...back off psych and social workers...your kids are perfectly smart...who WOULD want to do more work???? Sounds like the comment of a genius!!!
That is hilarious. They outsmarted the test!!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry they equate gifted classes with more work.
Do neither. Do the children even know what the gifted program is? Ask the guidance counselor to explain what being gifted means and the benefits that will come their way and ask her to please retest your children. They are obviously very bright!
ReplyDeletefabulous! the doctors told my mom i was retarded because i wouldn't answer their questions on one of these tests when i was little. luckily, i am still able to manage quite well, having the highest scores in my high school and national dean's list in college... wish i could go back now and have a chat with those doctors. you know your kids better than outsiders, so go with what you think is right. that's the beauty if you decide to homeschool!
ReplyDeletemy son is all about the least amount of work possible and he loves the gifted homework because it is less boring.
ReplyDeleteHis consequence for misbehaving in class is that his teacher takes away the GATE work and gives him regular homework.
Show them a cool project that gifted gets to do that they don't and they might change their minds.
Good luck convincing the school though.
I found your blog through Sami, no Mimi, no Shortmama, oh crap maybe it was Viv? Anyway, whoever it was I thank them, I love it!
ReplyDeleteI have a daughter in AGP and it's really no more work just work that is a challenge for her, a normal classroom pace would bore her out or her mind!
BTW- You're a neighbor, I live just 45 minutes SW of you.
Laugh... They are soo clever to think to blow the test and take breaks throughout. Smart! Plus, they have great logic/reasoning skills- I mean knowing it was more work...brilliant! They are bright, I have never believed that certain tests mean anything important.
ReplyDeleteLaugh! And then laugh again!
ReplyDeleteoh my goodness!! Did you tell her that the kids failed on purpose? I give them credit for knowing that you could fail on purpose at that age! I don't know about there but here the whole "gifted" program is messed up, so probably better that they failed on purpose, haha. :)
ReplyDeleteLucky woman. You have three perfectly normal kids and you won't have to put up with that TAG stuff!
ReplyDeleteYou should be proud that they're smart enough to fail a test on purpose.
ReplyDeleteI remember being scheduled to test for Gifted in upper elementary school and sluffing the test intentionally because I didn't want to be "challenged." Lame.
ReplyDeleteI bet most of the kids taking that test fall into two categories - the ones who can't wait to do more work and stay inside during recess to help the teacher, and the ones who like taking it easy and are smart enough to realize if they flop the test they can keep coasting.
My youngest daughter's junior year STAR test results were all advanced, she barely missed anything...except math in which she scored below basic.
ReplyDeleteBELOW BASIC!
I laughed. As did my husband.
This is a child who is taking AP Calculus...probably the hardest math class in high school. She said that it was the last test of the week and she was just plain tired of all the testing so she just started bubbling in a pretty design. Yeah for her!
Laugh...I am! How funny your kids are and how blessed you are to have academically smart kids as well as kids who are smart enough to read a situation and purposely throw a test in order to gain the result they want. Street smart and academically smart. :) YEAH!! :)
ReplyDeleteAll you can do is laugh. I sure did. No offense. The fact that they would purposely perform the way that they did on the test is testimony to the fact that you have intelligent kids. Love'em, and enjoy them. It will be something you can all laugh about when they are older.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't be too heartbroken, based my own (fairly recent) high school experience.I dated a girl in the Gifted program and was friends with many others.
ReplyDelete"Gifted" becomes a social group in high school, only it's more of an unsocial group. It becomes a very tight-knit group, which can be wonderful in some ways and brutal in others. The kids I knew had a lot of close friendships but struggled with other students because until high school, the interaction with non-Gifted students was so limited that they struggled connecting with everyone else.
If teachers are willing to work with kids to allow for some flexibility in the work, that can be enough. It doesn't have to be a separate group that can cause social issues among students.
Wait till they have to take the short bus, then they will beg to take the test again.
ReplyDeletePlacing children in gifted classes is a school districts method of balancing the special ed population(gifted is part of special ed). I don't know your disrtrict/ demographics but that has been my experience on a personal and professional level.
ReplyDeleteMy son took the test at school and scored well above average and was placed in gifted. Wait, I am not bragging, there is more. When I took him to the psychologist to be tested for ADHD, he was in a bad mood. They tested his intelligence and he tested below average. It totally depends on the day, the child's mood, and the child's attitude toward the test. The fact that your kids wanted to do poorly and did shows more about their intelligence than a silly test.
ReplyDeletereminds me of a girlfriend in high school who blew threw the ACT exam by answering A,B,C,D,C,B,A,B,C,D etc. because she didn't want to miss going to lunch with us (and maybe someone might have told her the test didn't really count anyway...) She got a 16.
ReplyDeleteI've just begun reading your blog & I love it, its so funny :)
ReplyDeleteCheck out our blog as well
www.momsinheels.net
Er, I did something similar as well as a kid. When I was in K, I was moved up to 1st grade. It was so easy, but I didn't like it. No one appreciated my sarcasm (yes, even at 5 I was pretty good at it) and I'm pretty sure they were all jealous of my ability to make fart noises with my armpit and burp on command (I had an older brother who really loved me). So I told my teacher it was too hard and would get stuff wrong on purpose. I went back to K and coasted all year.
ReplyDeleteI've been a slacker from the get go, it must be in my genes. :shrugs:
They are obviously intelligent children. This just cracked me up!
ReplyDeleteI don't know about how the gifted program in your school system works, but your kids have done a disservice to themselves by throwing the test if it's anything like the program I went through in school. I found the gifted program to be the most enriching experience I ever had during my public school education. Your kids are mistaken that it's going to be extra work; when I was in elementary school, the gifted kids spent one whole day of the week in the program where they would have special projects and lessons, and yes, assignments, but we were excused from whatever class/homework that our regular homerooms did that day. In middle school, Extended Studies (gifted program) was just another class period. It's not extra work heaped up to overwhelm your children...for me it was a wonderful creative stimulus. I would suggest seriously looking into the gifted program your school system offers, and look into having your kids retested. If it is a good program like the one I was happy to be a part of for 8 years of my schooling, your children are seriously missing out on a great opportunity.
ReplyDeleteI've always thought that if you are smart enough to be in a gifted program, you were smart enough to fail the test. Being bored in school can have benefits later on. Even some of the best engineers and scientists can have very long and tedious times at work. Your children can learn that they don't always need someone else to provide intellectual stimulation. Learning to daydream while still paying attention can be a very useful life skill.
ReplyDelete