November 6, 2008

Flu Shots


My kids love surprises, which is why I didn't tell my boys that they were getting flu shots until we were in the parking lot of the pediatrician's office.

"What are we doing here?" asked Cortlen nervously.

"Surprise!" I shouted as I threw a little bit of confetti into the air.

I was a little hurt by the response that I received.

"Oh no!!!" Kellen wailed.
"I'm not going in there!" screamed Cortlen, pointing at the primary-colored torture chamber.

A deluxe bribe package that included a Happy Meal, a Dollar Store light saber, and thirty minutes of uninterrupted play on the riding lawnmowers at Home Depot was unsuccessful in coaxing my sons out of the car.

"Let's go," I said, counting to three.

While I crawled in one side of the car after one bad listener, the other bad listener climbed out the other. I didn't realize how strong twin B was until I wrestled him to the ground. I looked up to find the entire population of our pediatrician's waiting room staring at me through the front window.

By the time that we entered the pediatrician's office (a good 10 minutes later), every patient under the age of 7 was crying hysterically. Thankfully, Cortlen was there to calm everyone down.

"I'll bet that I'm not the only one getting a flu shot today!" he shouted.

I apologized to the other moms for ruining their surprises.

I have no idea why our normal wait time of 30 minutes was cut down to 2 minutes. No clue at all. A nurse hastily ushered us into a room and, without delay, produced two syringes from her pocket.

"Let's get this over with real quick," she said.
"Let's get all of you out of here real quick," she said in her head.
I held the first victim down while the nurse poked his bicep.

"That didn't hurt at all!" shouted Cortlen the second that it was over.

"Mine didn't hurt either," chirped Kellen a minute later.

"I was very brave," Cortlen announced to the waiting room on our way out.
"I didn't even fuss or cry," shouted Kellen triumphantly.
"Good job guys," I said as sincerely as I could.
"Let's go to McDonald's," I suggested once we were all safely in the car. All of that exercise had made me very hungry.

17 comments

Stephanie said...

This cracks me up. I do the "surprise" thing sometimes too. The last shot appointment I had required calling in two extra nurse reinforcements to hold down my 4-year old. The 5-year old curled up in fetal position with his ears covered under the examination table. And the flailing arms and legs of the shot victim kicked my one-year old in the face and knocked her over backwards. When the whole ordeal was over I had 3 hysterical children. Normally I would lose my mind, but it was TOO funny. I just laughed out loud. Even the nurses said in their own way that they would rather give themselves 18 shots each than be me.

Skubaliscious said...

At least they are doing yours in their arms now - I had to de-pants two hysterical 4 year olds....talk about adding insult to injury.

Kimberly said...

When I was about 9 and my brother, 4 we went to the pediatrician so I could get examined for something or other. My mom brought my elderly aunt along to look after my mama's boy brother in the waiting room. He, of course, screamed hysterically as soon as my mom was out of sight. So my aunt decided to "comfort" him by saying - repeatedly - "You don't want to go back there! You'll have to get SHOTS!! Maybe three or four of them!!" Women were going past my exam room saying, "Can't someone DO something?!?! Why won't she just shut up?!?!" Yeah. We were really popular there! :)

Anonymous said...

I am taking my kids for their's later today. My 4 year old is already worked up about it (maybe flumist for her?). It's my almost two year old that I'm a little concerned about. He tends to get so mad about shots, he holds his breath and passes out. (A far cry from my oldest who didn't cry at a shot till she was 18 months.) At least we'll be in a doctors office just in case...

Liz said...

Look at those super brave faces!

:)

Rachel said...

I had to cancel the 'surprise flu shots' yesterday due to Mr. Farty's ear infections. Both kids were overjoyed. Little do they know that when they were out of earshot I RESCHEDULED!!!! So, the surprise will resurface on 11-26, only this time it will be a suprise for grandma....she's the one taking them in for 'checkups.' Hee hee hee...

Carrie said...

I can so relate to this!

Unknown said...

Hahaha. Once, when my baby sister had to get her school shots and my baby brother had to get his baby shots my little sister was like a demon. She clung to a chair leg and would not let go for the life of her. My mom was fairly embarrassed. I thought it was hilarious.

Leslie said...

Oh the surprise shot thing - been there, done that too! At least this time Captain Crazy was able to do the nasal mist for his flu "shot". It was so nice not to have to wrestle him to submission in front of scads of on-lookers. However, his four-year immunizations -were a completely different story.

Hope said...

It kills me that these big, brave boys aren't so brave when it comes to shots. I am referring to my 2 boys, and all of the boys in the U.S. who get thier shots. You got off pretty cheap though. I had to bribe my boys with Thomas the Tank Engines, you know, the wooden expensive ones. I still have to hold my 6 year old down. It looks something like those WWF Wrestling shows, minus the flashy costumes. I'm glad your boys didn't think it hurt so much.

Adelina said...

We recently took our two to the doctors for their flu shots. The kids were told that after the shots they would get to pick out a little something from the toy store. When we got into the office the nurse asked if the kids would rather have the mist or the needle. The kids got upset because if they got the mist that meant no trip to the toy store.

They got the mist!

Anonymous said...

Last year I took all three of my triplets for their shots and it was a disaster. One did just great no problem. The next one had to have one nurse to pull her out from under the table and me and another to hold her down. Then my sooo brave son who was screaming at the top of his lungs had to have me and three nurses hold him down and one to give the shot. Then when it was over and time to go he barfed all over the floor. I went back a few days later with a big bouquet of flowers for the nurses, so that they would let us come back. LOL. This year I'm taking them one at a time.

Brossettelewis said...

What tough little men. Congratulations on not breaking into the death threats.

Anonymous said...

I think someone should have taken a pic of the doc or nurse when you pulled the camera to take a pic. I love it! I must admit sadly my trips to the doc office are pretty lame as theylove them and the tattoos they get when they are done.

Ice Cream said...

This is why I all too often forget our doctor's appointments. My brain just blocks them out.

And we have almost identical shot bribes except instead of lawnmowers I promise them 30 minutes of button pushing time in the toy isles of K-Mart.

P.S. I gave you an award today.

Unknown said...

I'm bummed my doctor never let my kids' meltdowns get us in and out faster. Then, he might remember the time my oldest got away when they had to draw blood and the staff and I had to chase him through the office. And he could move fast when properly motivated, too. I'm enjoying your blog!

Anonymous said...

I bought my nephew a Flu plush toy to help talk to him about the flu, and so he would have something to focus on while getting the shot. I think it really helped. http://www.giantmicrobes.com/us/products/flu.html