February 23, 2009

Close Call


Because I am a nice mom and lack common sense and good judgment, I let my five-year-old son carry the plastic shopping bag containing the clothes that I had just bought him out of the store.

"I would feel better if you put the bag in here," I said, pointing to the basket attached to the back of Cameron's stroller.

Cortlen responded by shoving the shopping bag up his shirt.

We had some time to kill before we had to get to the next destination, so I took my pregnant son and his siblings to Toys 'R Us to look around.

Cortlen spent the next 20 minutes crying about the injustices of the universe and, specifically, my unwillingness to consider exchanging his new pants for a glow-in-the-dark light saber.

I spent the same period of time trying (unsuccessfully) to locate an aisle of muzzles.

Cortlen waited until everyone was buckled in their car seats and the car was in reverse before announcing that he lost his bag.

My son spent the next 5 minutes scurrying up and down every aisle of the toy store looking for the bag like his life depended on it, because, in a way, it did.

Thankfully, Cortlen's suspicions were unfounded. No one stole his prized sweatpants. He found the bag of clothes next to shelf of giant pre-packaged Easter baskets near the front of the store.

***
What have you lost and where?

34 comments

Maria said...

my mind...

Anonymous said...

my waist...pregnancy #3 did it.

Bellamarin said...

funny my purse got stolen right out of my cart in Toys R US and I yelled and ran after them ,6 month old daughter in tow and they dropped it at the front of the store by the beach buckets.Hey, it was a Coach purse with an uncashed paycheck inside and for one of the few times in my life a nice amount of cash. Alas no more and I carry my purse!

SewMuchDetail said...

I love your blog...Thanks for making us all laugh!!

becca said...

I once left my umbrella stroller at the dr. office. The receptionist called and asked if it was mine. I hesitated, then replied that it was. I asked her where I left it, because I could have sworn I had a kid in it when we checked out. She said it was found in the middle of the parking lot. Thank goodness I took the kid out first.

Sass E-mum said...

I've lost Peaches' umbrella in the pub. I can't go back and collect it. That would mean confessing that I took her to the pub and what kind of mother would THAT make me.

Likes Chocolate said...

In my obsessive compulsive self stupor I cleaned some trash out of the car before I got a pedicure. The next day I went to get the earrings out of the car that I had just bought the day before at Macys. I couldn't find them anywhere. I had thrown them away.

Deb C. said...

I can't remember losing anything of importance, but I did once "steal" a container of 'Baby Vicks' chest rub from Walmart. My son liked to take things out of the diaper bag while in the shopping cart. I didn't pay attention to him putting the unpaid-for item back in the bag and didn't find it till 2 days later when I was packing for a trip. Very embarrassing conversation with a nice employee followed.....

Janae said...

Right after we had our 3rd child my husband dropped me off at Old navy and then went next door with all the kids to big 5. I shopped for about 10 minutes then went to help him with the kids. When I found my husband I could not see a car seat or baby. He had left the baby accidently in the car. Luckily he locked it and the weather was wonderdful. I ran fast as I could and found her fast asleep. We had a 4 year gap between the second and third and were still adjusting to a child that did not get out of there seat belt on there own. We now have 5 and have never done that again.

purejoy said...

oh ha ha, i was going to say, does losing my mind count? but apparently i'm not alone!
i lost my sense of humor when i found dirty dishes on the living room coffee table, a wet towel wadded up on the bedroom floor and a labrynth of cosmetics and hair products in the bathroom she doesn't even use!!
yes, my daughter. i'm losing it big time.
but i guess i'm supposed to eat it all up because she'll be gone from the nest in six months.
i hope i still have a mind then.

Lady of Perpetual Chaos said...

We frequently lose burpies (our lovies) at the store when my 4 year old insists on taking it and that she won't drop it this time. At least I get to walk around the store with her looking for it instead of standing in line waiting to pay. Looking on the bright side, right?!?!

Holly said...

I have lost everything: keys, my PIN (completely GONE one day during pregnancy and then back 2 months later), my wallet, my husband, my carseat, my laundry, and on and on.

I don't know how, I just do.

Before I had these kids, I lost NOTHING. Never.

Pam said...

I let my son (than about 7 or 8) carry the Old Navy bag w/ a couple pairs of jeans and a belt through the mall. I took them all (3 kids) into the women's bathroom. My son left his bag hanging on the hook inside one of the stalls. I didn't realize it until about 10 mins later. We went back and searched the bathroom (fun) then walked ALL the way back to Old Navy to see if it was turned in, then talked to mall security. I must admit I suspiciously eyed everyone in the mall carrying an Old Navy bag. We never found it.

April said...

pacifiers. thousands and thousands of pacifiers...

Shaunte Wadley said...

I left a child once, at the movie theaters.

In fairness, I have five of them...and they all look a lot alike.

Lolli said...

Oh boy. What have I NOT lost? Keys, purse, kids, shoes, coats, SOCKS at friends houses!!!

Jenni said...

I left my wallet lying open in front of the cash register at Sears. I had just purchased 2 pairs of shoes (at a great price on clearance) and my kids were acting horrible. I quickly paid and left the store. We walked around the mall for about 30 minutes before they were so horrible I left. I didn't realize it was gone until I had loaded the kids in the car. I had to unload them and haul everyone back into the mall. I found my wallet in the same place I had left it. I guess it wasn't a busy day at in the shoe department at Sears.

ChrissyMcGee said...

I sent my 4 yr old daughter in one end of Snoopy's Playhouse at Knott's Berry Farm and waited for her to come out the other. After about 15 frantic minutes of looking we headed over to the Lost Child desk and we were very relieved to find her sitting on top of the counter sucking on a lollipop, looking very nonchalant. "You got lost," she said simply. So I guess I lost me.

Kathy said...

I found my engagement ring in the trash can next to my bed last week, courtesy of my toddler. Lesson learned.

Mary and Steve said...

Occasionally my little one will kick off a shoe and I will just grab it and stuff it in the diaper bag or my pocket. I love how nice passers by are, "looks like your little guy lost a shoe". After about the BILLIONTH comment I will just given in and take the other shoe off!

Cami said...

Sigh. My telephone. Because it seems to be glued to my right ear (whether I like it or not...) I seem to misplace it an awful lot. The other day I was in a PANIC, because I really needed it. I even checked the fridge, where I have been guilty of leaving it before. Finally after what seemed like a zillion hours, I located the irreplacable device in my youngest sons underwear drawer. Go figure. (And no, my laundry STILL isn't done... where's that stinking fairy?)

Mrs. Kindergarten said...

Last summer we visited the St. Louis Science Center, where I gave in to Oldest Son's pleas to make a dino at the Build-a-Bear in the basement. We wandered around for a while, then as we were getting ready to leave I notice that Youngest Son was still faithfully toting his cardboard house. Oldest Son - empty hands and not a care in the world! Do you have any fracking idea how BIG the St. Louis Science Center is? We finally found it, next to a hands on exhibit on the top level by the glass walkway that goes over the highway. The whole time I was muttering to Oldest Son "if we don't find that d@mn thing I will never buy you another stuffed animal as long as you live!" Yeah, I'm up for Mom of the Year after that one!

Oldest Son has also left an entire case of Hotwheels at Taco Bell, a lunchbox full of Star Wars figures in the parking lot of the pedi's office, and countless random toys at the neighbor boy's house. Youngest Son isn't such a "loser" Thank God!

Nikki said...

My son - in Target. My daughter was 4, my 3 week old baby was attached to my chest and my 2 year old threw a fit and ran away from me, headed straight to the back of the store. Luckily - the Store Employees just stood by and watched the whole thing happen: Me leaving a full cart of groceries/necessities, my diaper bag, and 4 year old to guard them, while I held the new baby as close to my chest as possible while praying that the running wouldn't cause permanent brain damage later. I finally found the little beast about 1/2 way to the back of the store. I snatched him up by his overalls and carried him out of there (you know, me holding the straps in the back and him dangling like a sack of groceries) while trying to push a full cart of groceries and not squish the infant....All with the same employees (and patrons by this time) just staring me down....

Had I known you then I am sure I would have had the gall to just open my mouth and say something very clever

Ethan, Zach, and Emma's Mom said...

My husband lost his cell phone once. He found it the next day. In the used kitty litter. Courtesy of a toddler. He got a new phone.
;-)

Becca said...

Libido. (It's either lost or on one heck of a sabatical.)

Vanessa said...

I lost my cell phone once in Joann's fabric store. My kids were being absolute "angels" as they often are in Joann's. I started frantically running around the store looking for my cell phone, when another patron offered to call the phone for me to help me find it.

So, I gave her my number and let her call my cell phone. That started ringing.

In my bra.

Crystal said...

The comment above me totally reminded me of mine haha.. I had Alana who was sick at childrens ER and Kaila was a baby at the time, still nursing and she would just not stop screaming and Alana wanted to be held because of you know the whole 103 fever thing..We were in a shared room.. which will not happen again if I have any say.. little ass gurney with me, alana and a screaming hungry baby.. YEAH NOT. Anyway out of my 3 kids she was the only one that took to pacifiers and she had 2 when we got there and I could not find it anywhere in the exam room.. I got up at least twice holding Kaila (alana screamed each time)I had puke buckets and blankets etc etc.. It was just a mess and that damn binky was nowhere to be found.. As we were leaving (like 6hours .. and a migraine later) Guess where I found it?? In the middle of my boobs being cradled in my bra.. I was so pissed at my boobs let me tell you..

Mackenzie said...

when i was 11, we went to disneyland and my parents bought my and my little sister mickey mouse t-shirts. that was our big "souvenir", which of course, we fully intended to make use of every day for about a month after we got home. unfortunately, that was not to be the fate of the mickey mouse t-shirts. they were abandoned on some random bench somewhere in downtown disney, i believe. i had to settle instead for a beauty and the beast pen. it didn't do anything either, it was just a pen.

niki said...

with two rambunctious boys, i am slowly losing my mind like the rest of you.
however, i lost (or my belief that it was stolen) my cell phone while i got a pedicure on the eve of my scheduled induction for my first child. i've also "lost" my oldest son twice while out in public. we were at a children's discovery center and were pointing up at the ceiling for him to look at something when we noticed he wasn't there. after what seemed forever of searching, we found him back at the entrance where the water display was. he did the same thing at a huge aquarium that we went to. all four of us were taking turns going down the slide in the kids area. my oldest son went down first and then i followed. my husband then came down with my youngest son and quickly asked where was "f." after frantic searching, we found him at the top of the climbing structure for kids. the tone of my husbands voice let him...and everyone else in the area....know that he was in some serious trouble.

Maree said...

HAHAHA--I love the comments as much as your post! Thanks again for the humor.

The list is long: my mind, my memory (NOT the same as my mind), my phone, my ATM card--more than twice, and many times the treasured pacifier or rag/silkie. Those rags/silkies cannot be purchased and are sought after as if they are made of solid gold instead of a raggedy cloth diaper. Now the kids are old enough we leave them at home--whew!

Post-it Note said...

Oh my goodness, yesterday I lost my keys and I was a complete wreck all morning looking for them for an hour, and I had to reschedule an appointment that I had already rescheduled! Now it's to be in March, cross your fingers. Grrr. I turned my whole house upside down, and I was so angry because I was praying so hard!! Plus I yelled at my baby. Who yells at a baby?! My neighbor came over and made it better. We decided there must have been a creepy guy at the appointment and by not going I was saved great torment. Last night I found them in the pocket of the umbrella stroller in the garage. Of course.

Seth and Natalie said...

My daughter has a ratty little stuffed dog she takes everywhere, and even though I try and keep that toxic toy home, sometimes she sneaks it out. She lost it in the pet dept. of Walmart once, where I'm sure people thought it was a used dog toy. And darn the bad luck, we found it.

Moose and Family said...

My little brother used one of my mom's camisole tops for his "silky". It was light blue with cream lace & spaghetti straps. He was about 2 years old when we lost it at the Las Vegas International Airport. The poor kid was devastated, of course, and no other "silky" was going to do. I wonder about the poor person who found my brother's generously loved silky.

I Meanie said...

I lost my van keys this past Saturday at the park. I go to the park to walk the track for exercise. after walking around the track 2 times I decided that I had enough exercise and was going to go home. I went to get my keys off my belt loop and noticed they weren't there. it seemed I dropped them somewhere along the track. took a 3rd time around the track and still didn't find them. So I had to walk 2 miles home to get the spare set of keys and have my husband take me back up to the park to pick up the van. Exercise is overrated.