March 23, 2010

Hearing Voices

This afternoon, I found Cortlen crying on the sofa.

"What's up?" I asked as I plopped down next to him. While I waited for his reply, I began flipping through a stack of mail.

"I'm hearing voices," he told me.

I put down the mail.

"What kind of voices?" I asked.

"Bad ones."

"What do they say?" I wanted to know.

"They tell me to do something that I don't want to do," he answered.

"Like what?" I prodded. By this point, I was quite concerned.

"They tell me to say the word 'poopie' really loud." He covered his mouth to stifle a giggle.

"All right," I said, standing up. At the same time, my son collapsed on the floor in a fit of hysterics.

"Way to stay strong," I commended, as a symphony of fart sounds emanated from his armpit.

Six-year-old boys rock.

36 comments

erin said...

What a trickster! I was totally concerned for a minute...

HW said...

Ah, the potty humor stage. I remember it well. Favorite words at this stage for my son:
poopie
butt
bootie
underwear
fart
bra (which he discovered by looking at the JcPenney catalog underwear pages with his little friend.)

Finally I'm reminded of a stage I don't miss....

Brandi Parshley said...

Too funny! I'm totally NOT jealous of your life!

Jennifer said...

I don't think boys ever really get over potty humor. Noah started giggling at poop and butt when he was in preschool, he still does it in first grade and I noticed the other day that his father finds these things funny too. He's 37.

the thrifty ba said...

we are deep in that stage now.
so. much. fun.

Angee said...

Wait till they hit 10. The armpit farts gain volume each year...

My Mercurial Nature said...

Oh yes, it's just the beginning...these things simply get funnier with age. And really, that was pretty darn funny!

Country Mouse said...

Boys will be boys... Too funny!

holfam4 said...

HA HA HA!! I love your blog :) I don't comment much, but I read every day...and laugh every day! Your kids are so funny.

Confessions of a Mother, Lawyer & Crazy Woman said...

Love this one. From the mom of one six-year-old boy to another, I get it ... and am smiling!

Stef said...

That really is funny! Something about boys and farting, burping, stinking, etc. I have four of them...it is a lovely smelling sounding place!!

MrsDixon said...

Haha! This is too funny!!! Boys never grow out of potty humor!

Emmy said...

Lol! Okay.. well I guess those voices aren't too bad :)

Miss A said...

I swear, I have the sense of humor of a 4th grade boy - any mention of "poopie" and I, too, collapse in a fit of laughter. Too, too funny.

Erin and Ryan Harris said...

Your blog cracks me up! I love it!

Diane said...

Funny, they NEVER outgrow it!

One Pork Chop said...

Ok, I got a little scared for you for a minute. Boys will be boys, right?

Eliana said...

I can't stop laughing. THANK YOU!
elianaosborn.wordpress.com

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

Oh my gosh, his voices know my kids too. And here they also say things like "What would happen if you turned your grape juice cup upside down and shook it around?" I hate the voices. Hate them.

Rachel said...

This is cute. When I was about his age I confessed everything that popped into my head, including thinking the "c-r-a-p" word and "h-e-l-l" when I heard it from classmates at school. I told my parents EVERYTHING bad that I thought and that I did. I'll be honest, they got tired of it but I'm glad they nurtured my conscience by letting me "confess." :) Maybe he really needed to confess to you and then realized it was silly.

fleming Fab 5 said...

So funny! I love little boys!! You never know what they will say or do!!

lisha said...

Oh man...not looking forward to the potty language. It is just getting started around our house. I guess it can't be as bad as the bossy mouth older sisters right?

Vicky said...

Man, I was thinking '6th Sense' here...what a relief that he is normal and just as annoying as every other boy!!! My 4 y.o. frat twins don't know any other language besides 'potty mouth'!!

The Girl Next Door said...

This stage never ends! I was in the airport with my 17 YO daughter the other day and she was reading a sign about your "duty" as a passenger and called my attention to it and had me read it out loud. And of course she said, "I made you say 'doo-dy!'" This is my Honors College child!

Kids!!

OH and the 17 YO boy has given up arm farts for REALLY loud real ones. Which he finds hilarious. Gross.

Queen of Crafts, Current Events, and Such. said...

He Gotch ya!!!...

Brooke said...

I just found your blog, and it's hilarious! Love!

sheri said...

I'm a lurker but just had to comment! That made me laugh. Believe it or not, I miss that stage of innocent humor with my boys!

Sam said...

That's hilarious! Can he burp the alphabet yet? My 12 year old daughter wins that one in our house!

Laura said...

and so begins the life of a boy well on his way to practical jokes. hahaha Love it.

Pam said...

6 year old boys are awesome, for sure. Lucky for you it doesn't stop at 6. Mine are 10 and 12 right now. The goodness just keeps going and going.

Too Many Hats said...

At least he keeps you entertained.

Karen in NC said...

This is so funny! I think farts are hilarious too! (I'm 35) I have two boys-5 and 7, and a 2 year old girl. We also have a remote control fart machine we got as a dirty Santa gift for Christmas last year. The boys think it's great but my baby girl cries when it farts. :-P

Nishant said...

I was totally concerned for a minute...
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