November 5, 2010

The Human Tissue

My children are very affectionate when they are sick.

Everyone in my house has the sniffles, except for our cat, who got outside earlier this week and ate something unsavory. Since Wednesday, she has had explosive diarrhea (my trip to the discount vet is a whole other story).

"I love you so much!" gushed my son yesterday morning.

Tears came to my eyes until I looked down and saw the swath of snot on my blouse. Then I felt like crying for a different reason.

My two year-old, of course, sees me as a large Kleenex. By dinner time, the slime on my shoulders had calcified into sheets of ice.

"There's something on your shirt," my husband pointed out when I sat down.

I smiled as I watched Cameron crawl into his lap.

Two seconds later, my husband was asking for a sponge or a paper towel or a piece of toilet paper or AnYtHiNg!!!! It was pure panic.

The same thing that was on my shirt was now on his :)

29 comments

The Desert Girl said...

Nothing shows the true commitment of a caring mother better than her snot-encrusted shirt!

The things we do for love.....

Kara Lynn said...

Funny that he'd point that out. Isn't there ALWAYS something on a mother's shirt??

Emma said...

Ha! My husband insists on changing his clothes every time he gets spit up on them. Our baby spits up a lot. Sometimes, I avoid having him hold the baby just to get out of the extra laundry created thereby.

The Novelist said...

That's why I wish the paisley craze would come back. No one would be able to tell a booger from a swirl. It would be great.

katie said...

I always have a lot of stuff on my shirt...ranging from snot to baby food to spit ups...and ketchup hand marks...sometimes I wish I could wear disposable cover up clothes to minimize the laundry loads.

purejoy said...

couldn't agree with the desert girl more. true love = rockin your kids' green snot.

hope y'all feel better soon.

oh, and not to be rude… but when the urge comes over you to discuss your kitty's digestive issues… resist. the. temptation.
gah!
but i bet the way you would tell it would be HI-LAR-I-OUS!!
you do tell the best stories!

Misfit Mommy (aka the Antichrist) said...

Gotta love the glazed donut monsters!

Toshia said...

In all honesty my 3 month old spit up on me yesterday afternoon...I finally changed my shirt this morning. My husband told me that was really classy. I told him it was just part of the mother gig that I have no time for myself!
And same goes for my husband as Emma's...one little speck of something and it is the end of the world and he has to drop everything and change immediatly!

Daisha said...

don't forget that the slime ends up on the couch coushins too. Gotta love cold and flu season with kids around! My heart goes out to ya!

This Is The Day said...

Lol. Snot, spit up, and who knows what else are part of my daily outwear as well. I laughed the other day when I went to nurse my daughter the other day and found dried, crusty snot on my breast. Oh the joys of motherhood. :P

Sarah said...

I work in an elementary school, and sometimes work in the special needs class. It is a mark of honor when Makenzie (7 year old with Down Syndrome) wipes snot down your sleeve. It means she trusts you enough to be holding your hand at the time. I was grossed out and honored at the same time when this happened to me!

Vicky said...

Ahhhh, the humility we mothers have to endure. You were good to share the love, albeit unknowingly, with your husband. You will survive; he may not!

Heather said...

It doesn't end either. I had to try not to hurl today when my shot encrusted twelve year old son wanted to kiss me.

Making It Work said...

I don't think they even think about it - it is just instinctual. I am always like "did you just wipe your nose on me" and then they get all sheepish!

Desert Rubble said...

Hey, at least he's pointing out what's on your shirt, right? That's funny though how everyone is so much more affectionate when sick!

Anonymous said...

Give me a dirty diaper full of poop, vomit, bleeding wound, scabs... but for the life of me I can't stand snot!! That grosses me out to no end and heaven help me if a cold starts in our house... ew, ew, and triple ew!

Donna, Champuru.net said...

Along the same lines, my 2 year old has developed an unsavory obsession with her nose. More specifically, digging it. If her explorations yield any results, she will search me out and proclaim, "BOOGAH!" and attempt to wipe it on me. Oh, the wonderful joys of being "The Human Tissue." ;) We moms should be entitled to a clothing allowance, IMO.

Ruth Ann said...

Maybe that's why women used to wear all-enveloping Aprons or "house dresses" around the house....

Confessions of a Mother, Lawyer & Crazy Woman said...

EW.

Confessions of a Mother, Lawyer & Crazy Woman said...

PS Hope the family feels better soon!

Southern Queen of the Crazies said...

Ewwww. It's amazing the stuff we moms put up with, huh?!

Between Babies said...

LOL! Been there, too mama! Minus the explosive diarrhea cat. Our version was the vomiting dachshund. Fun times...

Kathie1213 said...

Spoken like a true mom!

K said...

My aunt (who didn't have any kids at the time) once returned to work from visiting my mum and I on her lunch break, with spit up on her shoulder. She proudly showed it off to everyone - "Look, my niece did that!"

Jennifer Taylor said...

Sitting in a restaurant booth with my niece who was eating pizza and cinnamon and sugar bread, turned to me and right before she began wiping her face on my sleeve asked "is this a nice shirt?"

Diva Ma @ Mommy Fabulous said...

They really can't take it!

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Kristin D. said...

My 1 year old has a nasty cold along with the croup. I am already on shirt #2 today and it's still early. I had to come back and read this blog post just to remind myself that it is a normal part of being a mom.

Anyway, I really enjoy your blog--thanks for the smiles.

Jennie said...

This is soooooooo true and so hilarious that I am not the only one that lives this life! Thanks for sharing your stories! You gotta laugh about or you might possibly cry right?!