June 20, 2011

Father's Day

Very early yesterday morning, my husband was startled out of his slumber by the sound of heavy breathing. He opened his eyes to find two of his children millimeters away from his face.

"We're hungry," announced a pair of seven year-olds who did not finish their dinners the night before.

"It's not time to eat yet," he groaned and pulled the covers over his head.

"But it's Father's Day!" Cortlen and Kellen cried in unison.

Later that day, I served my husband's favorite meal.

"You know I don't like this," said one of my kids as she pushed away the plate. "You're ruining my Father's Day."

A few minutes later, I brought out the fondue. While I was taking care of Cameron's latest catastrophe and my husband was talking to his own father on the phone, the same child pretty much poured entire bowl of chocolate down her gullet.

"You didn't leave enough for your dad," I pointed out.

"It's Father's Day," she explained matter-of-factly.

Over the past few weeks, we had purchased a number of high quality gifts for my husband including a set of clearance headphones, a book, and a bag of gummy bears. Cameron shoved the latter down his pants and ran out of the room.

It was late when we put the kids to bed. "Can you rub my back?" asked Cortlen.

"Not tonight," replied my husband. "It's way past your bedtime."

My son's eyes narrowed into slits. "Not even for Father's Day?" he hissed. "Thanks a lot."

Shortly thereafter my husband collapsed onto the sofa. He looked exhausted. "This day cannot end fast enough," he said.

*****
Any good Father's Day tales from your neck of the woods? Do tell. It will make my husband feel less violated.

23 comments

cinderelly said...

Ha ha. Luckily my husband's children were at their mother's house for Father's Day. He got to sleep in and nobody demanded any money from him. (We have teenage boys.) I think this was his first year without the boys driving him batty.

Do your kids think that you should be pampering them on Mother's Day? I didn't realize it was Fathers [Must Do Everything For Their Children] Day.

Yvette said...

My husband spent most of the day at church 6am - 3pm Then when he wanted to take a nap the children kept opening the door and asking him stuff or wrestling by his door. No matter how many times I told them to move. He had a well rested Fathers Day just like your husband. He was happy to go to bed too.

Donna said...

I made what should have been a nice meal only to be spoiled by the children ranting about it not being their favorite food (translation: they hate it). We were more than happy to let them watch movies or play on the computer all day long.

The Porter Family said...

My two and a half year old daughter came up with her own gift for daddy, without any help from me. The stomach flu! In fact, she shared it with the whole family. Such a sweetheart. ;)

The Turner Mafia said...

We always get a shirt for my hubby for Fathers day. I took my oldest (5) shopping with me and found the perfect shirt! Worlds's Greatest Dad! Only in the wrong size. I quickly searched the folded stack for a Medium and stuck it in my cart. Yesterday when we gave him our cards and gift he opened it and held it up. "Worlds Greatest Grandpa" What the...someone had placed this Grandpa shirt in the stack, I only checked the size not the saying!

Mom of 12 said...

At 9:39 I texted my daughter to inquire about the breakfast in bed they had been planning for him all weekend. I found out later they were all still asleep. That food finally arrived at 11:43. He was pretty hungry by then and totally stir crazy from waiting around in the bedroom all morning. After church he was supposed to hang out with the kids while I cooked dinner, but by the time we sat down to eat with all 12 kids around us and the grandkids and my dad, he had prepared the meat, the mashed potatoes, the gravy, the spinach, and the watermelon. I know...I'm not sure what I was doing...I made the rolls and the green beans. Does that count? OK, the rolls came out of a bag... I did do all the cleanup though, and as his biggest gift he got a mini trampoline so he wouldn't have to worry anymore about the two-year-old getting bounced off when the bigger kids jump. Yeah, I married a good one!
Sandy
www.twelvemakesadozen.blogspot.com

Melinda said...

My children had to be reminded to tell their dad Happy Father's Day. Then my son insisted that he give his dad the gift of playing Wii with him for several hours, though he never wanted to play a game Dad wanted to play. Then I made steak with chimichurri sauce and pasta olio for dinner. I was met immediately with my daughter's comment, "Well, what are WE having to eat?" It's fun raising kids, huh?

Outside the Pumpkin Shell said...

Good stories? Like my intent to be on time to church, looking my best (not like a mom), roast in the crockpot?

Just prior to leaving (on time) for church I fulfilled one of my husband's fantasies... I poured gravy all over myself. The only problem was, I was fully dressed... and it's not actually one of his fantasies. hmmm...

It was all forgivable, considering we came into church during the opening song...

And all went off without a hitch, until I learned that it's possible to overcook a roast in a crockpot. Thank the stars the man is gracious...

Andrea said...

Yesterday I made my husband drive 5 hours in 100 degree weather with a screaming 3 year old, a complaining 12 year old and no air conditioning.

Beth @ Sand To Pearl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BadgerCubinMN said...

Had a great fathers day! Outdoor and lake activities on Saturday. Boated, skied, played cards. Camped out in our friends' backyard on the lake with my son. Woke up and read scripture at church. Ate breakfast and drank coffee by the lake with our friends. Got three great cards from my wife and kids. Had a nice massage. Didn't have to make dinner. Relaxed the rest of the day. Kids let me read them books, and went to bed. Awe! Some!

You can read all about it on my blog (www.badgercubinmn.blogspot.com)

dotdot. Elizabeth said...

I love the logic of your children that 'it's father's day' and after all don't all parents exist for there children?? ;) - What's yours is mine and what mine is mine! Thank you for sharing this post.

Anna said...

I actually remember getting super close to my mom's face when I woke in the morning to ask for breakfast (and usually before 6 AM). I have it coming to me, I can feel it...

Net said...

My husband was treated to an early breakfast... that he made for our 3 oldest children (6,5 & 2).
I fed the baby and then promptly went back to bed, taking a deliciously long nap followed by an irresponsibly long shower while he wrestled the kids into their church clothes.

His protests were met with my reminder of Mother's Day and the 9 loads of laundry I did.

michelle said...

Ahh you crack me up with your writing what fun it must be to live in your house!!! Love how your kids thought it was their day!!! You have a wonderful sense of humour

SweetDebbie said...

Yes, it seems Father's Day is really Kids Day.

My family went to the Getty Museum and all my 3-year-old son wanted to do was go to the beach. So at the fancy Getty Mosaic Tiled pool he proceeded to take off his short and go in. What a disaster.

Laurie said...

Okay, I am feeling really sorry for your hubby right now. Poor guy! Maybe next year (or next week!) you can send the kids away for the day and really pamper him. I think he might deserve it. :)

Susan said...

I let my husband sleep in and I prepped our 3-year-old to say "Happy Father's Day" as soon as Daddy came into the room. I was in the kitchen when he got up but I heard her proudly yell, "Happy MOTHER'S Day!" Made me laugh.

Lissa @ MyThriftyTreasures said...

Phew! This post made me feel better, so did all the comments! My sisters wedding was that weekend so we were gone the whole time. Hubby drove back late Saturday night to be home for his 8-hour block of church meetings...Baby and I came back Sunday afternoon. House was a wreck. I hadn't showered. Baby was teething. No clean dishes. Better luck next year!

Roxannev said...

I know this is few days late but I thought your husband would still appreciate he didn't have the fathers day my husband had I was trying to clean up after our late breakfast/lunch and my one year old needed a bath so I asked him to keep an eye on her while I did the dishes he was sitting on the bathroom floor trying to enjoy a book when I suddenly here him Yell " oh no Cambry" turns out my one year old decided to give Daddy an extra gift and poop in the tub I guess he didn't notice she had done it until she was batting it around he spend the next hour cleaning out the tub and pouring draino down the drain trying to keep it from clogging our drain that is just one of the benefits of being a dad! anyway just wanted to say I love your blog you are awesome!

Tasha Hickert said...

Our father's day was actually pretty good this year (kids 15,11,9) but my brother texted at 8am that he was at the ER with his family because the 20-month old had swallowed a penny and it lodged in her esophagus. They got transferred to the ER in our town (30mile drive with gaggin/puking child) so they could open up the surgery unit and call in an ENT dr. "Happy Father's Day" I told him when I brought a clean outfit to the hospital for my niece to wear home.

Turns out the doc that got called in was my son's football coach last fall so I made sure to wish him Happy Father's Day, too!

maria said...

My daughter accepted the fact that her father got to do what he wanted on Father's Day graciously. However, mid-day, she declared that Monday would be "Kid's Day" and began loudly making plans for Kid's Day. (top of the list: eat at McDonald's and get the house messy)

Marcie said...

Your posts always make me smile, but this one had me laughing out loud. Luckily, my husband doesn't expect much, and we always deliver:)