December 11, 2008

The Christmas Star

Decorating the Christmas tree is a cherished family tradition in the Mathews household. Every year, we drink store brand hot chocolate and listen to the Jingle Dogs bark out holiday favorites as we hang our extensive collection of foam ornaments on a 6 ft fir tree purchased from a Home Depot parking lot.

This year, we sang the carols a little bit louder in order to muffle the sound of Cortlen kicking his bedroom door upstairs. He was upset by the video evidence that proved that it wasn't his turn to put the star on top of the tree.

"Christmas is yuck!" he screamed through the air duct.

"Knock it off!" growled Tim through the vent. Cortlen's crying was drowning out the singing poodles.

"I'm going to get a chair and knock that star off the tree!" threatened the air duct. "Really, I am! You just watch me!"

I began to fear for the safety of the foam ornaments.

In order to protect our investments, we were left with no choice but to tell the Grinch that he had to stay locked up until the tree was decorated or he could control himself, whatever came first.

The Grinch chose to stay in his cave and announce (through the vent) what he had bought me and Tim for Christmas. Unless I let him put the star on the tree, I would not be getting a hot pink plunger.

In a failed attempt to soften the Grinch's heart, we turned up the Jingle Dogs and put the speakers next to the air duct.


Synia said...

LOL...Ah the joys of Christmas!! Kids sure do have a way of keeping us parents on our toes...

Ilana said...

It will be sad to miss out the hot pink plunger!

The Jingle Dogs sound awesome, though. What gets you in the holiday spirit better than a singing poodle!

Unknown said...

I can think of two reasons Cortlen would have found that to be the perfect gift for you,
1) you must love hot pink
2) you must need a plunger a lot
What a useful, thoughtful gift you will now be missing out on.

Jessica said...

hahahaha... sounds like my Christmases past. Love your blog! I'm a fellow English major, but without the rewarding Doctorate.
p.s. I'm hosting a giveaway on my blog. Enter to win!

Brossettelewis said...

Your daily counsel enriches my life.

Mrs. B said...

So MY house is not the only one that has temper tantrums and hissy fits when it comes to the decorating festivities....?

Lydia said...

We can't listen to Christmas music while we decorate the tree. The music gets turned on, then gets turned louder and louder with each song. We start yelling just for the sake of hearing one another. It makes me angry, I end up cursing, everyone, including myself ends up in tears. Ahh family traditions, you gotta love em.

Just Jaime said...

Three words:

I heart you.


Rachel said...

I hope you were able to stand firm in the face of such incredible temptation....I mean a pink plunger? How do you do it?

Maree said...

I LOVE this story! I think I'd be sad to miss out on a hot pink plunger too. It's good to know that every house has a Grinch who gets to live in his (or her) cave.

Surfer Girl said...

Ohhh. How sad your awesome present might be taken back. I already received one of my gifts this year and it was a rockin' pair of pink rubber house cleaning gloves that would probably coordinate quite well with your plunger.

I have fond childhood memories of the battles over crowning the tree- including being shoved off a chair into the wall by my (much)older sister. Good times!