May 6, 2010

Your Assistance is Requested

Just this morning, I received the following very excellent email:

David to me
10:23am (4 hours and 13 minutes ago)

I am a journalist who is writing an article on parent-child relations and in the process of my research, I stumbled across your blog. I feel compelled to say that I find your parenting strategies--as well as those of your readers who comment on your site--to be abhorent and malicious. I am appalled at the number of parents on your blog who derive pleasure from embarrassing their children and then brag that they are 'mean moms.' It's horrible that you take the title of 'mean mom' as a badge of pride. How can all of you live with yourself? You should be ashamed. Have a nice life.

For whatever reason, I've received a number of these sorts of emails lately. Usually I ignore them, but this one is the first that I've received that directly names you, the reader, as a co-abuser. Clearly David is a diligent crusader for human rights and thus deserves a timely response. Rather than speaking for the group, I thought I'd give you the opportunity to defend yourself, if that is even possible. Personally, I fear that I am too far gone to ever be anything other than mean.

In all seriousness, why ARE we so awful to our children? How can we live with ourselves after tormenting our offspring day after day after day? When and how will the madness stop?

In your responses, please avoid the use of irony, as David is not familiar with this rhetorical device.

Also, remember to have a nice life.


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Amanda said...

I am so awful because I fear that my children may possibly turn out like David. (And by that I of course mean perfect and noble.) When will it stop? Probably when they go away to college, or when DHS finally decides to step in.

PS: David, Can you tell us what life was like growing up with a Stepford wife?

Jen said...

The coddling mom speak - "We LOVE our children and want them to become WONDERFUL people. Without our influence, they won't be as wonderful. We'll stop when we can't reach them anymore."

Now the tough mom speak - "We do it so we don't have kids who are pantywaists. It'll stop when we're dead. Now go to your room."

christine said...

Dear David and those like minded folks,

Do you even have children?

Every mom in the history of the world has been called mean by their child for one reason or the other. Mostly for telling them to do something like clean their room.

Or after having to tell your child numerous times why they have to do something or not do something has just out of fatigue or frustration said "It's because I'm mean."

Why do you feel the need to judge moms who really are trying their best to raise happy, healthy children? Moms that are trying to find humor in the day in day out difficulties that really, sometimes make us want to cry.

Embarrass our kids?! Are you for real? You've never seen a red faced mother in the check out line with a screaming child? Please. I love my kids and I love being a mother but it's hard. It's wonderful and hard. The most challenging and rewarding job.

We struggle everyday to do our best. So please, give us a break.

Diane said...

Oh for crying out loud, I'm so sick of people getting offended at every little thing! Your blog is great, I love your sense of humor! If people don't like it, just pass, no one is forcing anyone to click. Having a great life, thank you very much!

Kayla said...

That email is flat-out hilarious. It's called "mean mom" because all kids think their parents are mean when the parents make them do something they don't want to do, not because parents are abusive. Facts of life. Golly.

3 Little Snaps said...

Has the dude never heard of the word HUMOR?? Besides he is a MAN not a MOM. Anyone who is a mom knows that humor is the best medicine and keeps us all sane and in our best form to be a good mom. What an idiot.

Stephanie said...

I want my child to have character. I want him to be a respectful and hard-working adult. I sincerely pray that he doesn't grow up thinking the world OWES him anything. So, I'm gonna do my damnedest to make sure that's his outcome and if ignoring his tantrums, assigning him chores and not giving him every toy/piece of candy/etc. that he asks for (demands) then so be it. I'm a mean mom!!

Chrissy Jo said...

It seems like a lot of the blogs I read have had their writers attacked lately. It seems odd to me that there are people out there wasting time writing mean e-mails and comments on other's blogs. If you don't get the blog, if you don't like the blog then don't read it! I don't think you're a "mean" mom. I think you're hilarious though! If I could write about dealing with the day to day stuff the way you do I would probably be better off.

beangirl said...

Dear David,

It's clear that you are a sensitive boy who is deeply troubled by the many injustices in this world. I had no idea that 8-year-olds were allowed to become journalists, but what a brilliant achievement for you! I'm sure your mother is very proud of all you have accomplished, no doubt with her never-tiring assistance. Good work! You get a gold star and three new DS games!

Oh wait. I've just been informed that you are not, in fact, a small child. In my defense, you can see where I might have made that mistake. Usually it's only small children who percieve the application of discipline and being taught how to function well in society as, you know, "meanness". Silly me. Good luck on that article!

Lulucarrot said...

Okay David! I'll just let my children do what they please and never ever insist they wear weather appropriate clothes, not eat candy for breakfast or make them do homework. Being a "MEAN mom" means we stand up and do what is right and not easy to form character and give our kids limits. Also we can laugh at ourselves and now DAVID. Thanks David, I am having a nice life and have already been called a mean mom today! (My offense was informing my daughter that flip flops are against the rules at school even if they are silver, sparkly and fancy).

Punken said...

David is absolutely correct how dare we?!?!?!!? Someone apparently needs a lesson is sarcasim and sense of humor.....get a life David!!!

Anonymous said...

Both my husband and I are "mean" to our kids because we are sick of seeing their peers - snotfaced, spoiled brats who get everything they think they deserve without earning it. My kids have a lot but a lot is also expected of them. FYI, there have been countless times that I have been approached about the good table manners, speaking manners, and general good behavior of my children. This comes from our "meanness".

I agree that David may be irony- and/or humor-impaired, though. Clearly something that comes from not having a herd of possum babies clinging to you nonstop.

Heaths said...

Dear David:


Oh, wait, you were being serious.

Remind me how many times you've given birth? And how many hours a day you spend in the company of your offspring and ONLY your offspring, with no other adult contact?

We love our children. We love being mothers. But please, it's not like a stroll through a rose garden. Life is fun and difficult and exciting and exhausting and hilarious and dull. A dose of humor and maybe a little sarcasm can help you step back and laugh at your situation.

Try it.

Lissa said...

Look - if my kids call me a "mean mom" cause I make them use good manners, learn to control themselves, and take responsibility for their choices - GREAT! That's how you raise children to grow into responsible adults who can take care of themselves and don't come running home every time someone says boo! Good grief, David! You're an idiot.

Laurie said...

First of all, Mr. David is not a mother nor could he have any children to make such comments. He also completely missed the point that you call yourself a "mean mom" is because that is what all kids say about their moms when they don't get what they want.
Second, to answer the question of why I'm a mean mom - it's because I want my kids to stay alive and then be able to function in the world. I think all of us "mean moms" are just trying to raise our kids to be healthy, polite, and all around good people.
Sorry to get on my soapbox - I absolutely love this blog. Not only is it fun to read (and relate to you and the people that comment), it's made me try to look at my everyday mishaps with a little more humor instead of wanting to cry or explode. Thank you so much!!

Emz said...

I'm sorry. [ well I'm not] but seriously, when do people have TIME do write crap like this to others?


I hardly have time to be the "mean mom" I wish I could be.

Melissa said...

So Jana, I'm thinking David is obviously like some 14 year old, grounded in his room for calling his mom mean. Obviously not somebody who has ever dealt with a toddler's tantrum. Because really, who's dealt with a kicking, screaming whirling dervish and doesn't find some way to find the humor of it all?

Jordan said...

The real lesson David should have learned: don't tick off a group of people who aren't afraid to be mean ;) . (But perhaps that comes from having a mother who didn't love him enough to be "mean.")

(Oh yeah. I just went there.)

Kyle and Alli said...

HA HA HA HA HA!!! And just in time for mother's day of course! :) This cracked me up!

I wonder if David is a parent himself. The only perfect parent is one who does not have children.

Heidi said...

David, you're the kind of person who reassures me that there are some things so inane and petty that they really DON'T deserve my attention. One less thing I have to worry about while I'm being "abhorent [sic]" to my kids.

The Kanigan Clan said...

I would like to know who hasn't been called a mean mom by their children. If they haven't been called a mean mom, I'm assuming that those children have never been asked to make their bed or to clean their room. Parenting has it's rough patches and if you cannot laugh at those moments, then it's making your job as a parent even harder. As a fellow parent, I'm glad to hear the stories that are shared, because I know when something embrassing happens with my childen, I know I'm not alone. David, please do not judge, until you walk in the shoes of a mom, who would rather risk some type of personal embarassment, and give her children extra life experinces. To me that is a great Mom, even if at times she's labeled a mean mom.

Anonymous said...

I'll stop tormenting my children when they stop tormenting me :)

Country Mouse said...

Keep in mind this is a man talking. Just saying...

Aunt Crazy said...

David must be a child of those "feel good" parenting types that think everything is sunshine and roses and have no sense of reality, much less a sense of humor.

CLICK OFF David!!!

Rene said...

I'm the mom that did not believe in building up my children's self esteem, see I went for self-worth which I thought was infinitely better. A group of 11 kids were given F's by the teacher. Other mothers protested and called a meeting and asked that each of us visit this teacher and tell him what we thought of giving all these slackers F's. I met with the teacher to personally thank him for giving my son the F that he deserved. I was the talk of the school next day (all the kids kept their f's) and until the day my son graduated I was know as the mother who thanked the teacher for giving her son an F. His friends thought I was great. If you love your children you have to me "mean" at times. They have to know that there are limits to everything. I was happy to hear that someone is carrying on the title of the Meanest Mom. I was once that and I was proud of it. There are now 4 wonderful adults out in the world today and I know that they love me and are in fact glad that I was "Mean" They carry on the tradition with their kids. You do a great job, Jana, so proudly wear that "Mean Mother" title.

Briana said...

"In your responses, please avoid the use of irony, as David is not familiar with this rhetorical device."

hahahaha! jana, you rock! :)

Gina said...

First, I would point out to Mr. David that a large number of your stories are more about how mean your children are to you. Doing silly, unpredictable things, behaving in an un-becoming manner and not realizing it, now THAT is abhorrent!

I mean, does he even know that kids are supposed to be perfect? And here he is, blaming all the meanness on you, the innocent parent. Shocking. Just shocking.

Cathryn said...

It is incredibly obvious that you are not a parent. Although I will admit that not everyone who comments on this site seems to understand the irony that "the Meanest Mom" uses, I really don't think that it can be construed that we are cheering each other on and encouraging acts of maliciousness toward our children.

May I be so bold as to clarify that not all of the scenarios which are described here are completely factual, but more an illustration of the creative way in which the world is viewed by one mom. I for one am not as creative as she is and I enjoy the playful tone.
Also you must understand that part of the banter of The Meanest Mom is portrayed from the child's point of view. Can you not identify with some of the sentiments of having a mean mom; were you never a child?

May I now turn some time over to my son, Joshua (17), to whom I have read many of these posts and with who I have had lots of laughs and discussions, He says: "This parenting style toughens up kids so they don't grow up to be whinny apologist journalists."

And this is from the kid that was so Cortlen and Kellenesque! Need I say more?

Please, David, continue your research, but try this:
1-Study a mom in the quiet moments with her children, the times they read together, play, say prayers, hug and laugh.
2-Walk a mile in a moms shoes BEFORE you judge her! And that means, 9 months of pregnancy, 17 hours of labor, 24-36 hours of little or no sleep for several nights the first 3 years of the child's life, live through mastitis as you breast feed, feel the gut wrenching feeling of pain as you clean and bandage a wound on a child, etc. There is nothing that builds a relationship like the service a mother gives her child as she raises him through the good times and the tough times. But only the mom and child really knows the bond of love that comes from their time spent together ---despite the episodes that you read about in "The Meanest Mom".

lisha said...

Dear David.

While you mean well, I am sure you have no idea what it is like to be a mom and frankly, unless you have an unfortunate masculine name, I don't think you ever will be one.

While it seems like at times we are mean to our children, you need to stop and consider the alternative. Would you rather we ignore our children, let them roam the neighborhoods and turn into gang members? That may seem extreme, but an active role in our childrens lives is the best way I know how to help them become productive members of society.

Doing chores, finishing their homework and being on time to things are useful and necessary skills children need to learn. Maybe I have to be a little mean sometimes to get the results, but how else do you propose I do this? I can't hand them everything, or heaven forbid, do everything for them. How will they ever learn?

So maybe we have a little fun at their expense. Trust me when I say, we need it or we will go crazy. Life is hard. Our society promotes absent parenting as a norm, and often encourages it by making us feel horrible about not having a career outside the home. I just don't buy it. You can think I am a bad mom, but when my kids grow up to be great and have a wonderful sense of humor too, you will be eating your words.

Ruthykins said...

ok, after reading the post and all the comments i've come to the conclusion that i'm doing great as mom. now, i wish that my own mother had been "meaner" to me.

MJ said...

I never go out of my way to embarass my children. They do it perfectly fine on their own. I'd rather they learn when they're young that certain behaviors lead to embarassing moments rather than when they're doing important research projects and embarass themselves. After all, society forgives an 8 year old fairly easily for inserting their figurative feet in their mouth, but rarely forgives an adult for the same behavior.

mamacoreenie said...

Maybe David had a tough childhood and is lacking in the love department. I kinda feel sorry for him. David, do you need a hug? As a mother, my maternal instincts reach out to you so I'm sending you virtual hugs.

P.S. - Humorless people should not be writers.

Kacey Nielsen said...


Can I just say I love that you are able to laugh about that and let us laugh with you? I LOVE mocking my day to day mom life for the world to see online but I pretty much only get positive comments from my mom and friends in my same boat. If I were to get an email like that, 90% of me would be laughing but I'm pretty sure 10% of me would kind of hurt my feelings! I can be such a girl sometimes! So, just in case you are like me, don't listen to the mean old man. You are awesome.

From one of your many fans

MiaKatia said...

Jana, I absolutely love you and your sense of humor. And your readers are pretty fantastic too! Great comments.

Sheila said...

I don't think the definition of "mean mom" means we beat the crap out of our children all day and treat them like crap and hate them. It means we love them and want the best for them so we expect more from them. We expect them to be perfect and we teach them what not do do. It kills me that you get so much hate mail when it is very obvious you love your children and you're their definition of mean, not the world's definition. My mom always said a mean mom is a good mom. I get told daily I'm mean from forcing my children to eat their vegetables, get dressed, get out of the bathtub and turn off the TV. If this is "abhorent and malicious" then I feel sorry for the children out there that don't have "mean moms".

aubrey said...

Yeah...I'm also going to go with the opinion that I am mean because I don't want my children to turn out like that guy. Get a life buddy, and a sense of humor while you're at it.

CountessLaurie said...

Hi David -

Which post did you read? Because if these parenting strategies are abohorent and malicious, the Child Protection Services are going to need a bigger boat.

Have a child who is 4, 8 or 13 and then get back to us.

A fellow mean mom!

Annie B Larson said...

Dear David,
I am one of the many mothers who read and love this blog. I would like you to get the honest opinion of YOUR mother. I'm sure she will find it amusing and will be able to relate like the rest of us. Without mothers there would be no world. Get over yourself, David. You can start making comments as soon as you become a mom, oh wait you can't, that priviledge is only given to the Daughters of our Heavenly Father.

Have nice life.

Kelsey said...

Awesome. Completely awesome. I haven't ever commented on your blog before, despite enjoying it greatly and laughing when my husband asks if there are any new posts, but I couldn't resist today, as David is just too much.

Shanin said...

I'm curious to know if he has any kids of his own and if so, do they also have no sense of humor? I was considered quite mean when my kids were small and yet my girls are kind, smart, polite and humorous themselves. They are independent and strong minded and not whiny brats who were molly coddled to death. I had someone come up to me and ask me what I had done in order to have such considerate teens and I told her, "I expect it of them and always have..."

Diana said...

Wow. He has no idea who he's messing with. Go mean moms!

And my daughter is only 18 months old so she can't call me mean quite yet, but I see it in her eyes.

Alison said...

I don't have kids yet but when I do, you can bet they aren't going to like me. At all. One bit. Why? Because I will be the same kind of parents as all of you ladies and gentlemen who want their kids to grow up respectful, honest, hard working, and functioning. Seriously, David. You don't do any favors for kids by making their lives easy.

Oh and ps, both my mom and dad still get asked about how they got their kids to do things and behave. And you know what, I thought they were mean then but I am so thankful for it now.

LemonyRenee' said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lydia Story said...

No matter what anyone says, your blog makes me laugh and know that there are women out there trying hard to be good mom's too. We aren't all Stepford wives like you said. Some like to pretend they are, but here we share our trials and learn and laugh together. Until dear little David experiences being a true mother I don't believe he has any right to tell you what to do. So post on!!!

Kelly said...

According to my 4 year old I am somewhere between being his best friend and being the meanest mom in the universe.

Which label I receive usually revolves around treats, toys or TV. I'm fairly certain being the meanest mom in the universe means I'm doing something right. My son will grow up to know his boundaries, be respectful of others, gain a sense of humor about life and all while still maintaining a sense of humility.

because no one really wants their child to grow up to stand on a soapbox.

Booklover said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA...thanks for the laugh. I needed that today :)

Vicky said...

I can't comment. There's no such thing as 'speaking without irony' or sarcasm. Sorry.

leaving~the~girl~behind said...

Dear David-

I am a mom-to-be and a new reader to this blog. My first child has not even been born yet; I am due in September. In looking for blogs that I could use as a point of reference for challenges I am expecting to face as a mother in the next 18 years, I found "The Meanest Mom" and found it so candid and silly that I had to keep reading. I am not a supporter of child abuse or cruelty in any form. In fact, I work with young children day in and out in a social services position where I see different kinds of abuses on a regular basis and have yet to experience anything in this blog that is remotely abhorent or malicious.

I find your response to this blog almost as funny as I find it's content. Since I have yet to meet a person who I find to be perfect or who has a perfect life, and certainly admit to not being perfect myself, I personally try not to be so self-righteous and judgemental. Clearly you are a person of a particularly incredible character with a huge knowledge base on the subject of children, so I suppose it is only fair that you live by a different standard than the rest of us.

Much luck with your article.

Stephanie said...

Dear David,


You discredit the title of "journalist" with your abject humorlessness and stupidity.

With much love and best wishes for your career,
Yet Another Mean Mom
(Oh, and I'm a journalist, too.)

Anonymous said...

Ladies, ladies . . . don't we all know a temper tantrum devised for attention when we see one?

David, I don't buy it. Get up off the floor, stop kicking and screaming and acting out.

Now go by your mother something nice for Mother's Day and apologize for everything.

LemonyRenee' said...

Dear David:

Don't you think attacking people you don't know and don't understand is mean? Just mean.

Either you really don't get what is going on here, or you don't want to. That's your prerogative.

Now, go play in your own sandbox.

Eric M. Sales said...

Okay, okay, okay- I am not even a "mom" LMFAO!! I'm a "son" and I love your blog- what a freak-of-the-week!! I cannot stand people like this, I get emails like this all the time about the way I present myself on my blog, and ...ugh- it's just drama after drama from pathetic individual after pathetic individual. I had one email that ( when I printed it ) ran on 5 pages - not including that reject-footer page you always get from printing online. It's insane!!

Your TheBestMom got it? Good!! Tah-tah!!

Anonymous said...

Someone once told me that if your kids don't like you you are doing a good job.

I am not here to be their friend, I am here to be their parent.

okiron said...

Why do the most judgmental people pick careers where (imo) open-mindedness is needed? Good journalists shouldn't be so quick to judge.

jen said...

Being the mean mom is making me have a nice life. Thanks for asking.

Symply Me said...

I've recently had to put a plan into action, that I'm sure "David" would have claimed bordered on child abuse. Frankly, if I have to be called mean, because I go to great lengths to teach my children the difference between necessities and priveleges, I'm okay with that. I get compliments on my children's behavior all the time, and I'm sure that wouldn't be the case, if the same kids were raised by David...

Diane J. said...

At first I thought this was a joke. It's sad that it's not. David, email me: I mean it. I have many more answers to give you (politely) that I can't fit in this comment page. In case you are too scared to send an email, let me give you a few answers here.

1) If you don't find humor in life (whether it be through your children or your own) you are missing out on a joyful experience. There are times, when we choose to find the humor because the only other option is to curl up in a ball and cry our lives away. Since we are strong people we find the humor and continue on in our quest of raising competent children.

2. The "mean" things we do, we do out of love. For instance, my teen son thought I was mean because I wouldn't let him stay at his girlfriend's house...even though her parents were okay with it. Let's see do I want to be a grandma right now? No. My son sees it as mean, I see it as responsible parenting.

3. We share our experiences because we want to hear what other people think. We want to know that we are not the only ones considered "mean" for trying to raise respectful children.

Okay, one more: 4. I'm shocked that you can't read between the lines. We I share that I screamed at the top of my lungs "STOP THE BUS, I FORGOT MY CHILD!" due to a trying trip to Seattle, I'm sharing the story so others can see the humor, but they can also read between the lines that I love my children with all my heart.

So David, email me directly. I've got a lot more answers if you want them.

Karen said...

Wow. Great comments here. I really can't say anything that hasn't already been said....However, I'm wondering why David hasn't commented back to anyone yet??? Um...David?

[Stacia] said...

Guess he didn't read the parts about you bending over backwards to take care of EVERYTHING for your kids huh?
You are a good mom, I can tell.
And sometimes good moms have to be mean because they love their kids, want to teach them how to grow up to be RESPECTFUL, (pretty sure David doesn't qualify for that) adjusted people who don't think they are entitled to everything.
That, and those same good, mean moms need to stay sane. Thanks for your sense of humor!

Aubrey said...

This post had me laughing harder than any of them. And it shows exactly why I don't have male doctors anymore. My best experience with a OBGYN was when she performed my c-section 9 months pregnant. Every time I went in for a visit I would ask her how she was feeling and she would reply, "The same as you, lousy."

Jillian said...

Maybe one of your children is posing as "David..."

Gilbert said...

As a parent it is my responsibility to raise my child in an environment that will prepare them for the outside world when they go out into it. And not only survive, but also to succeed in that world. I think that requires me to allow my children to fail, get hurt a bit, not seriously, but a stinger here and there, and learn to get up, brush off, and move forward.

I think the problem with the world today is the lack of this with kids. Now I understand we have to protect them from the "evil" of the world, but we need to let them experience life and deal with real life situations.

If doing that is being a "mean parent," then I am a bastard I guess. But proud of it.

Leah Klein said...

Dear David,

While it may be hard for you to understand what it means to be a parent, I suggest you try it out.

I thank my lucky stars every day that my parents have never coddled me. I am about to graduate college, and I thank my parents every day for empowering me to be able to make it in this world successfully by myself (with the tools they gave me). My parents always made it clear to take charge of yourself in order to be successful in life. And while from the age of 8-18 I thought my parents were "Mean", at least I am able to do things for myself!

Keep rocking, Jana!

Carrie said...

When my oldest was around 3, he told me that he hated me for the first time because I said no TV until he ate his lunch. I went to a church activity later that night with puffy, red eyes. A wise older mother put her arm around me and questioned what happened. After I told her my story and how devistated I was that he said that to me. She gave me a hug and told me if I don't hear that phrase every now and then, I am doing something wrong. Now as a mother of 4, I swell with pride (kinda) every time I hear it. I have the most polite children. I recieve compliments on their behavior all of the time. I contribute that to being a "mean mom".
My mom was "mean". I thought she was horrible growing up. I even called her Wilda (short for wildabeast) behind her back. Now, that I am older, I thank her all of the time. I am a better person for it. I want to be just like her! I was taught the difference between needing and wanting. If more people lived that way, I seriously doubt this country would be in the shape it is in.

I for one look forward to reading this blog. Laughter is the best medicine. We are all better mothers by being able to share experiences and fall back on eachother. Let us all pray that our children do not grow up to write these silly emails. I hope you all have a wonderfull Mother's Day filled with kisses from chocolate-faced kiddies and big baby bear hugs!!!!

HM said...

Dearest David,

It was so lovely of you to take the time to email Jana and voice your concerns over the widespread malicious, harsh and punitive child-rearing methods that are evidenced by this blog and those who comment on it (especially me).

I must admit, I am extremely interested in the techniques that you yourself have employed over the years in what I am sure are your own extensive experiences with child-raising. I am afraid that perhaps I have been remiss as a parent and I am sure that you could give me some insight on how I could have been a much nicer, loving mother, instead of spending the last 24 years as a Mean Mom.

And that was sarcasm, Dave. In case you didn't recognize it.

After some reflection, I really don't need your insights because, here's the thing, Dave. While I may have been guilty of "mistreating" my children over the years according to your standards, may have put them through the wringer when they were hideous little snots, and am definitely guilty of perpetrating a 10-year "Not Fair" memo myth to deal with an abundance of self-absorbed little temper tantrums, I'd do it all again. In a heartbeat.

I freely admit that I am not a perfect mom, as I know I've made plenty of mistakes over the years and I will make lots more before all is said and done. But what I have also done is raised two absolutely fabulous women who are bright, responsible, intelligent, caring individuals, both with college degrees and of whom I am unbelievably proud. One works with developmentally challenged children and wants to specialize in autism. The other has a dual major in marine science and ecology. Both plan on getting master's degrees, possibly higher, in their chosen fields. And both will definitely be "Mean Moms" when they have their own children because news flash, Dave:

We're their parents, not their friends.

And that means that we get to make the hard decisions, the ones that have our kids screaming at us that we're terrible, the worst parents ever, why can't they have that game or those clothes or that car? It's not fair, everybody else gets to wear/eat/do whatever they want, why do they have to clean up their rooms/dishes/messes? How dare we teach them manners and respect for others? How selfish of us to punish them for lying or smacking their sister up side the head or sneaking out of the house. And how dare we check up on them and call their friend's parents and make sure that they aren't out until all hours of the night drinking or worse.

That's what it's like to be a good parent, Dave, one who cares so deeply about your children that you willingly become the meanest person on the planet if it means that they will grow up safe, strong, well-mannered and responsible. It's not easy, Dave, and it's not pretty. In fact, it's the hardest job on the planet and you bet we all use sarcasm and humor to get through each and every day, because the alternative is to go sit in a corner and cry.

So yes, I am proud that I'm a Mean Mom. I'm proud to be the daughter of a wonderful Mean Mom. I'm proud to have raised two future Mean Moms. I'm proud to have friends who are just as mean as I am. And I'm proud of every single person who comments on this blog because trust me Dave, each and every one of them is doing what is right for their children instead of what is easy. If you think that we're online boasting about our mistreatment of our children, I can live with that. If you think we get some sort of sick pleasure out of inflicting "suffering" on our children (the horrors of rules! curfews! please! thank you!) you're more than entitled to your opinion. And if all of that makes us "mean" in your eyes, Dave, so be it. Trust me, I've been called a lot worse. (By my own kids, in fact.)

Catherine Dabels said...

I am a stay-at-home of four as well and I have my nephew who lives with me and I also foster 2 children most of the time. And my advice to this man David is - until a man is even remotely capable of walking in my shoes he can take his wise 'man' opinions and shove em. Because that's about all they are good for....finding a home up his @$$.

Sara said...

I find this hilarious. "Have a nice life." teeheehee!

Courtney said...

I think this is GREAT! I will bet he doesn't have children, or if he does it's still quite young and I'll even go as far as to guess that his wife stays home with said baby.

If we weren't "mean" once on a while our children would walk all over us. Mine still try and often tell me I'm mean. It's part of being a parent. A good parent, even.

Cheers to all the Mean Mom's out there! I'll bet you have great kids!

Queen of Crafts, Current Events, and Such. said...

He-is-a-drone.....A crunchy granola bar liberal ...No doubt. He believes in nothing, but yet also knows very little about anything.
He has obviously led a very coddled, baby pee pants life.
Motherhood is nothing without a sense of humor....
His mama probly locked him in the
He is angry at anyone who is a great parent ,but yet also manages the fine art of the lighter side of life. Keep your chin up Meanest Mama...I get you...
PS Your humor gets even more fun when they are teenagers and young adults.....Heck! You got a good 10 years of great blogging.

Megan said...

Obviously someone (Ahem...DAVID) is taking things a bit too literally. ;)

Natalie said...

Clearly, either David doesn't have children, or David has never been the main parent responsible for raising said children. If there are moms out there that are nothing but peaches and cream 100% of the time, I've yet to meet one. And if I did meet one, we probably wouldn't be friends anyways.
Thank you, Meanest Mom, for giving us real moms a place to vent and not feel bad about it.

Maureen said...

I'm a mean mom and so dang proud of it. I follow "Meanest mom" because she brings the humor into the best and hardest job ever, raising our children to be functioning, happy adults.. Im a "mean mom" who has raised 4 of the best kids ever, 3 of whom are adults now and thank me for being so mean they ended up descent human being's.. I'm thinking David has no sense of humor, which is what you have to have to survive the hard days..his letter made me laugh out loud..

Eden said...

I don't feel guilty - one because I don't think I've ever commented on your blog before the "David" note. But here are my thoughts.

First - I'm proud to be a "mean" mom. I define this as I know how to tell my children "No." Therefore they tend to think of me as a mean mom. When they are moms though, it's my hope that they'll follow my example (so that as grandma I can say Of course).

Second - I love reading your mom adventures because I can then quote them to my husband and either say "See, we aren't the only ones" or "See, honey, it's no so bad. It could be worse."

Thanks for sharing!

Jessica said...

It is quite obvious that David does not have children. Being a mom means that you have to be "mean," plain and simple. If you let kids have their own run of things, it would be pretty bad. If you don't laugh about it, or share your experiences with friends (even if you have never met them) your only other option is to cry about it. I prefer to laugh, it makes me a better mom. No mom or child is perfect, hopefully we do the best we can.

PS David your mom didn't raise you right if she didn't teach you to not make mean comments to moms you don't know right before mothers day. I may be a mean mom, but at least my kids will have common sense and maybe even a little discernment as well.

Brooks said...

I vote that David sit next to you and your children on your next plane ride. Apparently, you two would have a lot to talk about...

I fear for the future of the world and the rising generation...

Lorelei said...

Wow, best post ever Jana! At first, I was just irritated with David's letter. But then I read all the comments from your awesome readers and I don't even want to make a comment to David. His ignorance, arrogance and general stupidity doesn't deserve one.

But your readers made my day and I feel so much better about being a "mean mom" that I might actually enjoy my mother's day for once.

Thanks everyone!

Joanna Wilson said...

years ago one of my daughters (she was 16 months at the time) had an eye infection. my doctor was hosting a med student from the nearby med school who prescribed an antibiotic ointment. The first thing he said was: this will sting a little but once she realizes it is making her better she won't fight you. I kinda looked at him cross-eyed. and then he said something that made me think twice and i said>>"you don't mean i have to wake her up every two hours do you...of course he said...plainly and as nicely as i could i said "you don't have children do you?" he was very offended and told me his wife was pregnant...i told him to call me in a year or so and we'd talk. so us in a year or two after you have kids and we'll talk

Michelle said...

"Mean" would be not warning David before he sits down on the gigantic stick protruding from his backside.

Kait said...

If my kids are happy with me every second of every day I'm not doing my job right. Because if they are either I have beaten them so far in to submission that it never occurs to them to disagree with me OR I've coddled them to the point that I have made myself incapable of being the parent in the situation.

It's my job to be their parent, not their friend. That means I get told I'm mean and bad and horrible and that I'm ruining their lives. That means I tell them no and I do things that are logical but to my kids come off as embarrassing. I'm not a perfect parent (just ask my kids) but I know I'm raising kids that are independent, stubborn, smart and well behaved. Being mean is just the added bonus of being effective at not giving in to everything all the time.

And David, I live with myself because I know I'm doing the right thing for my kids. I know that because I can still laugh at myself and the situation, even when it's ridiculous and even when I would rather sell my kids in to slavery than listen to them fight one more time. (that was a joke. just thought you might need me to clarify.)

Ann Michelle said...

Bravo, Bravo - to all the mean moms out their. My first thought when I read David's comments was - Obviously this man doesn't have any children ( or he's living in some kind of fantasy world that doesn't exist for the rest of us). I love your blog - being a mom is the best, hardest, job I've ever had. I wouldn't trade any of those silly, hard, sad, happy, crazy, wonderful moments for anything - but you have to have humor or you would go insane.
Currantly, I am the meanest mom in the world because I make my six year old get up and go to school everyday and while he's there he has to learn to read, write, do math and science, take turns, share, learn about the world in general, exercise, etc. Maybe one day if I'm mean enough he might use these skills to -ummmm- be a journalist - but only if he has a sense of humor!!!!! I love my life!!!!

Kait said...

And my FAVORITE comment on this whole thread is the anonymous comment of "I'll stop tormenting my children when they stop tormenting me."


The Richardson's said...

You should have posted his e-mail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(and still should by the way.)

David- I give you two, maybe three hours with just one child- and then we will see how quickly you change your tune. You have zero sense of humor and need to grow up quickly.

p.s.- I have never commented on this blog before and read it everyday. Everything said in this blog is hilarious and it is ALWAYS evident how much your children are loved.

Molly said...

Sounds like that guy has never been a mother.

Tom and Karen Mortensen said...

I read some of these comments and I loved all the ones I read. This guy needs major therapy. He needs to get a life. I can't believe people sometimes.
Everybody keep up the good work of trying to raise responsible children.

Six-Pack Momma said...

Dear David,

I am an avid reader of Jana's (aka: meanest mom's) blog. And like the others who comment here, I can connect to her.

Not because I revel in the embarassing things us 'mean moms' say and do to our kids, but because I can relate. Relate to the mundane and crazy things life with small kids throws at us. And rather than getting upset, we choose to see the humor in it. So it is not because we are truly mean, rather it is because we love them too much to ignore them.

So before you judge Jana by her blog (which she admits is only a tiny glimpse of a brief moment of her day) take a look at yourself and the judgements you have made. Sometimes the tender moments we share with are children are too sacred to publish.

Before you publish your findings, I suggest you do a little more research on parent-child relations. You'd be surprised to find that the same child who screams, "You're the meanest mom EVER!" is likely to leave a note on your pillow proclaiming you to be "The best mom in the whole world!"

Because children are like that. They are forgiving. They are Christlike. We aren't perfect, but we do our best. And our kids see that.

If you don't have children, I feel sorry for you. Have a nice life, David.

aka: six-packmomma

Two Beautiful Girls Mommy said...

From David's email it is obvious that he does not have children. So in order to make his research more complete I hereby nominate him as your permanent babysitter. Maybe after a few hours with some real children he will understand that without a sense of humor there is no way any of us Mother' could survive!

Cheryl said...

Hahaahahahahahah, I cannot help but laugh. I was mean to help me get through the day. I have three children and as horrible as I was to them for at least 6570 days of their life, they call at least once a day and more commonly three times a day. And, may I add, my two sons are married.

David, you need to lighten up and if you have children, I hope that you are mean too! They need discipline

Anonymous said...

Dear David,

Want some cheese with that whine? Want a cookie?

Anonymous said...

Dear David,

You are obviously not a journalist. Journalist are supposed to steer clear of biases. You fail at your made up job, because I doubt anyone would have hired you knowing that you would push your own personal opinion and then harass others who don't agree with you. You are also a liar and also terribly uneducated. How can you live with yourself? I hope you're happy with yourself (not really), but also, I hope you're happy furthering negative stereotypes of "journalists." You make me sick.

Also, get a sense of humor.

TheRapunzelGirl said...

seriously the BEST thing ever. because if parents aren't "mean" their kids grow up to be self-entitled, judgemental journalists named David.

i'm glad my mom was mean to me.

Andrea said...

My boys have had 12.5 and 14 years to embarrass *me* and now I am embarrassing *them* ~ about time, I say! I remember how much I was embarrassed by my Dad at that age - perfectly normal! And if my kids didn't say "I hate you, you're the meanest Mom in the world" at least a few times a week, I would know that I was falling down on the job.

I have been a early childhood educator for almost thirty years, focused on building positive relationships and supporting children's growth and development, and Jana, I *love* your blog. Gives me a good snort of laughter, which the world sorely needs more of.

Keep on keeping on - and next time any of our kids is vomiting on an airplane, let's hope it is David sitting next to us!!

Crzymom3byz said...

David, David, David you sweet sweet man.

Thank you for looking out for our children. I didn't realize that laughing and finding humor in the chaos that is my life could be so hurtful to my children. I am going to get off of this computer and go and tell my children how much I love them. I never do that you know. Because I bore these sweet boys I was hoping all I could do was make fun of them and laugh at them. I didn't know until your kind email that I was doing a disservice to mankind. From now on we will eat out every meal, we will spend all our money at the dollar store, we will live in our filth and we will only serve chocolate and sugar as snacks between our drive-thru meals, oh and my kids will never bathe and sleep when they feel like it. They may lose their teeth but I will never torture them again with horrible things like the dentist or a even a doctor. Thank you for opening my eyes to what life as a child should be like. I'll call you when I don't have enough money to post bail cuz I spent it all at the dollar store.

Maybe you should check out the Meth addicts that are raising children and don't have the brain cells left to even laugh at the funny things their kids do or say. Maybe, that would make for an interesting article?

I do have a nice life but thank you for wishing me one anyway. You are a very nice man and your mother I'm sure is super proud.:)

Fosters said...

Has David ever read the poem "I've loved you enough?" It's not about giving all your love and then it's gone, but rather a poem about how you had to day no, let them fall on their bike, watch them get frustrated when tying a shoe for the first time, etc. It hurts. It's sometimes funny, but it's how we learn to live in this crazy world called life. We may be mean in our children's eyes right now, but in twenty-fourty years (some are still slow to learn), they will be greatful. You aren't a witch, just mean enough to show your children (and the rest of us) that you whole heartedly love them!!

Fosters said...

One more time on my soap box, please.

I do not know one mom who doesn't love her kids. Doesn't want the best for them, and doesn't want them to be healthy and happy. We all suck. It's called learning. That's what makes parenthood so interesting.

Ruth P. said...

Oh please don't change. And as for David? Never mind about him.
I once heard a girlfriend threaten her children to rip of their arms and beat them with the bloody pieces. After I picked up my jaw, I thought it was hilarious.
Wait 'til David reads that.
And a friend and I are jealous of you, because in our day we didn't have a blog to share our feelings, we so would have!
And it would have sounded like yours....

reen said...

Oh jeez!
I'm an old mom, my abused children are 28, 27, and 26. I'm still mean to them every chance I get, and they love me for it. But it's not often enough. So I'm mean to my 34 pre-school students daily.
After years of observing Moms of my many students, I know mean. I don't think David does. (Not to say all of my Moms are mean) David sounds to me like someone who needs a Mommy very badly.

Carrie V said...

If we could not laugh at ourselves and the antics of our children (I have 3 boys), we would self-combust by 3:00. Seriously.
In the last couple of weeks alone, my 3 year old has peed off the porch, peed in circles on the porch, and has managed to find a camera as I was getting dressed after a shower.
Clearly David has no children or a sense of humor.

Kerrie (and Jason) said...

I have never seen so many comments on a post!

David - if your kids DON'T think you're mean, awful, horrid and nasty at least once during the growing up process you aren't doing it right.

As someone else posted - we are their parents, not their friends. The friend bit can happen later when they have children of their own and realise their parents were right all those times.

Is that non ironic and non sarcastic enough? :)

** waits for David's response... if he is game!

kate said...

hahahahahaha!! this really made my evening, thank you! good luck to you david. i sincerely hope you grow a sense of humor. without one, life is lame.

Mal said...

I wonder if David has children? Or if he has ever taught in public education?

I'm also trying to figure out which "punishment" is so embarrassing or abusive. Personally, I find them to be brilliantly ironic and instructive.

Corrine said...

$20 says David has no children.
And Jana, curse you for leaving your career to stay home with 4 young children. How dare you volunteer at their school, allow them to have play dates when your home is already full of littles, and take them on fun & educational outings. I'm surprised you haven't been arrested yet! Abuser!

My angel mother- when at the end of her rope and being accused of being a mean mom- used to tell us she had to go to "Mean Mom School" to learn how to be so mean. She (and my dad) raised four highly competant, well-adjusted daughters. If being mean includes teaching children boundaries & values, enforcing rules, requiring responsibilty, and *gasp* teaching religious beliefs and faith- carry on sister!
Your blog is a bright spot in my day!

Let's lock David in a room full of 2-6 year olds and see how long he lasts!

Sexy Naptime said...

AFter you tell this professional journalist he spelled abhorrent incorrectly, send him a link to a video of you giving birth that he will never be able to turn off

Sallie said...

Ok so here is a VERY serious reply because apparently he needs it.

One of the reasons I love this blog is because Jana takes things that happen (almost everyday in my life with my children) and she doesn't just retell it, she puts a fun humorous spin on it. We all get that she isn't making fun of the kids and trying to embarrass them. She is just telling us about her day. Letting the rest of us know that there is someone out there experiencing the same things we all do daily. Do you really think I would take the time to read a blog that didn't make me laugh at something? Didn't turn the experiences in life around and make it ok to be having them? I don't have time for that. I already know all about that. Its the sarcasm about each situation that makes it so fun. Lighten up! Go make a mud ball.

Now, I have to go because my 4 year old is throwing a temper tantrum because she can't eat ice cream for dinner. Why don't you tell me how I am supposed to deal with that Mr. Smartypants. Obviously you know ALL about parenting.

E.m.K. said...

Dear David,
As I can tell that you are a serious journalist that values a well-founded examination of a topic, I recommend taking your research further. Nearly anyone will tell you that personal experience is the best way to learn. Why not give parenthood a try, and read back over that email of yours in a year or two? (If you can find the spare time for such frivolities as blogs).

Sincerely, A Reader

Stephanie said...

A frequent conversation at our house...

me: "Go clean your room."

kid: "You are the meanest Mom ever!"

me: "That's my job. How am I doing?"

kid: "Great!"

me: "Thanks, I try hard. Now go clean your room."

Mean to me is a compliment! :)

Kristine said...

oooh, I wanted to add my two cents.

I am a mean mom. For example:

1) babysitting brother's kids for 1 week we realized we were meaner than the kids' parents. We don't provide our daughter with anything unless she asks and says please.

Nephew: Ohhh, I'm so thirsty!
Me: That's nice.

[pause followed by incredulous stare]

Nephew: But I need a drink!
Me: Oh!!! Well how do you ask for one?
Nephew: May I please have a drink?
Me: Of course. Thank you for asking so nicely!

Just this little thing we have about not meeting all the whims (needs and wants) of a child just because said whims are vocalized. Asking 1) provides perspective that others are providing for you and 2) gives the giver an option to say no so you can realize you don't get everything you say you want.

In an age where helicopter parents abound and children are getting playstations from the tooth fairy ((because their parents can't say "NO")) can I get a holla from all moms who are called "mean" by their children dozens of times a day - just for saying no? {{holla}}

May all 'mean moms' who have courage to say "no" to children. Stand tall. Stand proud -- that we are preparing our children for that day when our young 'uns turn 18 . . . that we have prepared them for life. That we have prepared them to need us no longer. That they have been told "no" from me enough times that when life says "no" over and over again they don't crumble to their knees - that they themselves will stand tall . . . stand proud -- that those "mean parents" have raised beautiful, confident, hard working, empowered children that (here's the key) NO LONGER NEED THEM.


Carie said...

Well obviously he has nothing else better to do, why is he reading your blog in the first place? I simply follow you because lets face it you make me feel like a better mother then I am due to how mean you are. HaHa not really I follow you because you are so dang clever and funny with your posts! I have a son with autism, and getting to laugh is quite important to me due to me usually wanting to cry instead, so hey thanks, and keep on being mean, it makes my day!

Gail said...

My favorite quote to my children over the years, which they hated, was "The guilty taketh the truth to be hard." "Oh, MOM!," they'd say. David apparently needs to figure that out as well.

Gail said...

(Jana, you need to speak to Parent & Child Magazine. I just linked your blog on Facebook and they give you this nice credit, but I'm afraid they need a lesson in dangling participles.... "Named the 'Best Blog' ..., chronicles ... mundaneness of a ... stay-at-home mom's life with four small children including twins in episodic form.")

Cindy said...

Oh David, thank you for justifying my "mean" existence. The world needs mean moms because of people like you. I'm sure your own mother would have some choice words for you if she had seen the words you wrote here.
If you can't say anything nice, then SHUT UP!
I hope your kids turn out to be just. like. you.

TORI said...

well, it's easy to remain idealist when you have no children.

I used to feel the same way - eons ago, now I have three children a total of 3 years and 6 days apart. Truly you are an angel.


David - you're an idiot. Literally.

Jesus Chick said...

If he thinks we are mean he should spend some time observing a daycare environment for a few days.

Oh well...sounds like a case of out of blog = must be utopia.

Rock on, Jana. Love your humor and sarcastic writing style.

pegzhere said...

Clearly David doesn't have any children. Or a sense of humor. Idiot. Oh shoot - is that mean?

Kirsty said...

Dear David

In order to understand/fully appreciate this blog, may I suggest that you:

1.Have a child

2.Look up the word "ironic" and the phrase "tongue-in-cheek" and ask a grown up to explain them to you (with examples).

3.Develop a sense of humour.

I hope this helps in your quest to have a nice life, it certainly has done wonders for mine.

Kim said...

Personally, I am not a mother yet, but I remember being a child and thinking that my mom was mean...and she is great! She did a great job raising us. David's research seems questionable to me, especially after he sent such an ignorant email. Way to go David...way to truly understand the parent-child relationship.

PS- I apologize for the sarcasm. I hope it is not completely lost on you.

Anonymous said...

Love your blog despite the critics. It is a lighthearted look at some of the tougher parts of our job as mothers. I really appreciate it. Thank you.

♥ Jennerific ♥ said...

Hey David, quit trying to be Goliath. Grow a funny bone eh?

Molly said...

I wish I could be as eloquent as your other readers, unfortunately I am blunt. Dear David, give me a break. I am a teacher and I see the results of coddling and "reasoning" parents everyday. Kids need to hear "no" and kids most importantly need to hear truth. Kids also need to learn that they don't always get their way, the world doesn't revolve around them and to learn to laugh at themselves. I proudly say that I, too, am a mean mom and all my kids love me for it!

Yolanda said...

Does David even have children?
"Mean" mothers LOVE LOVE their children and children love love their "mean" mommies. We are out to raise healthy, respectful, loving, kind adults and that means being MEAN - hee hee.
Proud to be the Mean Mom in this family!

Sarah said...

David doesn't have children. Obviously.

My husband and I were just commenting tonight that if our child didn't bring us humor... we might eat our young.

MaLeah said...

Ohhh, I thought I was the only one that got hate mail because of my blog! How exciting to find that I am in good company! Maybe David has been e-mailing me too since an anonymous poster called my husband and I controlling and then we got totally blasted for rehoming our dog when it caused allergy problems for our 1 year old. I can only hope to be as mean as you one day! You are my hero! My blog is not as cool as yours-- there is only so much you can do to humiliate a 1 year old, but man I am trying!

boricua78 said...

So,when was did you stop laughing at this ridiculous email? Was that before or after you told one of your children to "stop it/put that down/don't touch that/stop hitting your sister/take that out of your mouth/where are your pants?/what are you eating?" Oh, David, you funny, funny man.. get a CLUE!

Madeline said...

I think I saw you in the grocery store the other day, David. Yeah - you were the guy with the unruly toddler who was running and screaming through the aisles, knocking into elderly men and women. Why didn't you buckle him into the shopping cart? Why did you do that ridiculous nervous laugh as you called your son in that wimpy, quavering, failure voice. Why didn't you just say,
NO!"? Because you didn't want to be mean? How's that working out for you? It wasn't you? Just another modern parent who would rather be a friend to his child that actually parent?

If your kids don't call you a mean mom, you're not doing your job.

My job is to raise my 4 daughters with manners, morals, and humility. I despise participation trophies and unnecessary praise. Both should be earned, not given freely and unwarranted.

My worst nightmare is one of my daughters marrying a pu**y like you. Grow a set, you little weasel.

Anonymous said...

That's funny, I have a degree in Journalism and I seem to recall being taught to stay as neutral and unbiased as possible while "researching" and writing stories. Researching involves more than just reading the title of a blog and jumping to conclusions about what it means. Researching involves observing and talking to people to get the full story, relying on multiple sources, etc.

I also happen to be a mother. I wish that I had this blog to read when my daughter was going through the terrible two's. It would have helped me find ways to laugh at things she was doing rather than become frustrated by them. Being able to approach motherhood with humor literally cuts the stress in half. Hopefully, it also teaches our children to approach the challenges they face with a more positive attitude. Sounds like you could have used more laughter in your life growing up.

Good luck in the world of writing, David. While you're at it, consider taking a creative writing class and studying the definitions of humor and irony.

hugginsluvins said...

This week and just this week, I have been told that everything I cook for my family is crap, even though I want them to be fed, healthy and happy. When I brought home board games for my children to play with Mom and Dad as we have not been able to spend much good quality fun time together, my oldest son had a meltdown because my youngest son was given a 1$ bug catching kit. All this and more during Mothers Day Week! Happy Mothers Day to me! Motherhood is a thankless job made even more thankless by mindless people like David. I cannot count the number of times that I have locked myself in my bathroom curled myself up into the fetal position and cryed until my cheeks were raw! I visit Jana everday, rain or shine! Not because I wish to hear about her mistreating her children, but because she brings a little humor into the most difficult job position one can hold. One day Jana will be remembered as a woman who gave of herself unconditionally. I for one think that Jana is a saint as well as all the other mothers who call themselves or their children call "MEAN MOMS"

Lauren said...

I've been reading your blog for about a year now. I've never commented before because I'm currently childless, and as a result, I lack any personal experience to contribute to your posts, yet I return to your blog again and again. I think your children are adorable, I think their antics are hilarious, and I think your parenting style is wonderful. You clearly love your kids, and you also know how to laugh with, about and at them. I think that is a gift. You keep yourself sane. You have a good time. And I'm pretty confident your children will really appreciate your humor as they get older.
On this last point, I can speak from experience. Like you, my mother is well educated. She raised four children, and she was definitely a "mean" mom. She made us do things for ourselves. She didn't give into tantrums. She didn't buy us things when we demanded them. I distinctly remember telling her she was mean. I also remember telling her I hated her, but she never backed down. By the time I was in high school, my mom and I were best friends. She has the best sense of humor, and she helped me laugh through all that high school stuff. My siblings have similar relationships with her. We're almost all grown now. That awful meanest mom of mine raised a daughter about to attend a top ten law school on scholarship, a daughter happily married in the Temple, a son about to serve a full-time LDS mission in the Ukraine, and a happy 16-year-old daughter excited to start dating. We wouldn't be where we are if my mom hadn't been so mean.
I know you have an excellent sense of humor, and that you can easily laugh off the Davids of the world, but I still thought I'd let you know that I think you're intelligent, expressive, funny, and most importantly, a very good mother. I am not worried about your children's futures. They are being raised by the best.
Keep up the good work.

Julie said...

Geez David, that certainly was kind of you to give the resident mean mom's children a day off from the "embarrassment" that so many of us enjoy.
Jana, must be a great feeling to know that at 10:24 am your best blog topic was at hand.

Josh said...

Hey David. Have some kids and then talk to us about parenting!

Shaken Mama said...

My daughter called me a "Butt Gun" for asking her to put on pajamas before bed.

When she gets up in the morning I'll let her know that in fact David, the "journalist" who probably hides shoes he doesn't like behind the dryer, is a "Butt Gun." I'm just a run-of-the-mill mean mom.

Lanie said...

WOW! I also fall into the "meanest mom" role. I feared this role for along time, however I have embraced it as my children have gotten older. (They are 6,4 and 18months- I know not very old) I want them to be well behaved, polite, sensible children who know how to think and act for themselves. I want them to be responsible for their own actions, because if they aren't then I am.

I remember a time when guilt got the better of me whenever I "forced" asked my children to do something like clean their own mess up. Then I realized that if I cleaned up after them all the time and said please and thank you for them then what would become of them. I have now, unforutately became the "meanest aunt" with some of my nephews and nieces because I not only expect my children to say please and thank you, but expect it out of them also. I also have rules like children who can ride bikes without training wheels can not ride bike with training wheels at my house and no hanging from the lights pull string and no throwing thing out the 2nd story windows and no feeding the fish or petting them. All these seem like fairly simple thing and I never really needed to set them as "rules" with my own children, but when the nephew came over I found all of these things done literally. The tires were popped on the bikes with training wheels and the back tires ruined, light fixtures were dangling by there wires out of the ceiling, windows and screens had been removed to throw things out the window, and the poor fish were not only dead, but missing and found later behind the dresser. These things didn't happen all at once, but one visit at a time, but my house was being destroyed by visitors and when I they come over I go over the list of rules with them I have become the "meanest aunt" also, but hey I can laugh about it now and I also know if the nephews come over I will probably have to add another outrageous rule to my list. However I would rather not have to replace anything else.

To end I have to say, my children know how much I love them and although they think I can be a "mean mom", they know that there are actually children in the world that have mothers that are truly abhorrent, malicious, hurtful, and straight up abusive to them. The scary thing is that those moms don't think of themselves as "mean". There is another group of moms out there that are raising wild, crazy children that hang from light fixture and ruin other peoples thing because they can get away with it, they don't get told "no" and therefore don't think before they act. My children have also told me about them and that they don't want to be like that.

We call ourselves "mean moms" because our children have called us mean, however my children have asked me to set limits and teach them... so I am doing my job as a parent.

It is not hard to go on living with myself after having a "mean mom" attack. I mean really at the end of the day I go and tuck them into bed and they give me a hug and a kiss and say thank you for all the fun stuff we did and we talk about what can make it a better day tomorrow.

In reality the blog is generally one event out of how many in the day..

Heather B said...

because i'm a firm believer in the adage "One good deed deserves another"...only mine are in the form of grey hairs!! remind me to give every David i know, the stink eye!! LOL

Erin said...

I am a Mom, therefore I am mean sometimes. It just comes with the title. I love being a Mom and I am having the BEST life thank you for caring David! (By the way: my kids think this blog is hillarious!)

Susan said...

Dear David,

Do you have children? Clearly not, or, if you do, your children are probably the ones that come running to you every time a child sneezes in their direction and you step in with a hazmat suit to shield them from the potentially dangerous germs.

I am a "mean mom" because I refuse to be a "helicoptor parent." I believe that my mean parenting allows my children to grow and learn. It's what my parents did to me and what their parents did to them. Call it a family tradition if you will.

Seriously, grow up.

Jonny and Carissa said...

I think a lot of people, especially those without children, believe that discipline is "mean". I would love to let my daughter tear all the cans off the shelf at the grocery store, eat sour patch kids until she had canker sores and a stomach ache, and watch backyardigans all day because if I did, my life would be so easy! We would never fight, there would be no tears, and best of all, I would be the "nice" mom who could do no wrong.
But it wouldn't do her any good in 15 years when she is graduating from high school and going off to college on her own. so I am "mean". just like my mom, and her mom before her. and guess what, we've turned out pretty great. And when my daughter has her first child, she'll realize that I wasn't mean after all.

Michelle S. said...

Still no response from David.

I got a valentine from my kindergartener one year, all frilly with a big doily heart on it that said: "I love you, even though you are the meanest mom in the world." (a room parent did the writing for her at the class party)

I laughed out loud and gave her a big hug. She knows. She knows.

Keep on keepin' on!

Jonny and Carissa said...

also, there are several grammar and spelling errors in the "journalist's" email. clearly he takes his job very seriously.

and Jana, I don't comment on your blog but you are hilarious and many times I have thought that your ideas are fantastic... like if my daughter "lost" her brand new shoes that she no longer liked, I wouldn't have even thought to have her get the exact sames ones again! hello -- brilliant idea! you can't always get what you want!

prettybyrdie said...

It's "yourselves". How can you all live with yourselves? Sheesh.

Ber said...

This quote sums up what I'd like to say to this David who has never had to give birth to a 10 pound baby or learn to see the joy in the journey of raising a son with autism:
"The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache." Marjorie Pay Hinckley.
Take that David downer!!!

A Musing Mother said...

Dear David,

My sole reason for living is to give my children as much fodder for a therapist's couch as possible. I owe them that much. I don't want them to EVER feel like they have to take responsibility for their own actions. Blame the mean mom.

Childhood is far too short. Fortunately, I will always have a cat.


A Mean Mom

AzĂșcar said...

There is nothing I love more than saying "NO" to my children, especially in public, especially in a store, and especially in a way that causes them soul-wounding discomfort and embarrassment. It's delightful. A thrill of doing the right thing and not raising entitled pansies who expect the world to give everything to them and who lack the self-discipline to organize their lives independently.

Seriously, have you ever met a child? They get entitled, and they get it in a hurry if you aren't watching. I do mean things like making them clean the bathroom they pissed all over, insisting that they wear pants without crap on them (literally) in public, and that they finish their vegetables even if they are "GROSS."

If you aren't mean, you'll raise children who think they can be rude to waitresses, who expect that they'll be paid for just showing up, who wouldn't know a "Thank You" if it hit them in the head, who think that women are doormats to be used and tossed, and assume that their lives should be handed to them on a plate.


In fact, I don't think I'm mean enough, time to hunker down and re-double efforts.

damiana said...

I hate to blow "David's" cover. He has apparently worked very hard with his thesaurus to cover the fact that he is indeed no more than 10 himself. I just have to say, David, "BRILLIANT". After that pen-lashing you gave to Jana and all the other mean moms who love her, I'm sure that every mean mom will repent of their evil ways. Children everywhere will be singing your praises!

Anonymous said...

Apparently David did not get the memo.

HW said...

A few years ago my brother, who is now 45, sent my mother an article entitled "I Was Raised by a Mean Mom," She took it as an extreme compliment because the author listed all the things that his mother had taught him; all the things that he, as a child, thought were, well, mean.

The sender of that email - David, is it? - either has no children or is raising the kind of children that none of us wants to encounter while out in public.

I consider myself a "mean mom" but, if I might brag a little bit, my teenagers are wonderful kids and we have a wonderful relationship so perhaps a little "mean" in a mom is a pretty good thing.

Lighten up, David.

HW said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Courtney Alexis said...

I am not a mom, but I subscribed to your blog because I love it so freakin' much. YOU are the kind of mom I want to be. My sister and I have even had email conversation at work after we've read your blog and talk about how awesome it would be to have the life you do and have these experiences.

To me personally, "The Meanest Mom" title comes off as sarcastic ... in a good way! Like when a parent has to discipline their child in order to teach them and guide them, but the child doesn't fully grasp that concept and screams at you, "You're just so mean!"

David is stupid.

Mark and Denise said...

David, are you a parent? As a "mean" parent of five children whose teachers consistently ask if I can't keep sending them more students, or comment on how much they notice my children love each other, among other compliments, I would have to attribute my "success" to setting firm guidelines and having logical consequences that teach children a number of things:
1. There are limits of behavior
2. Aligning their behavior to those limits results in success in this world AND brings them both long and short-term happiness
3. Not doing so brings long-term unhappiness, and I'll help them realize the short-term negatives if they aren't readily apparent
4. I love them and have discipline myself enough to provide consequences for their poor choices when necessary, even if it requires some creativity and inconvenience to myself.

"Mean" parents' kids are lucky. They learn these important life lessons BEFORE the long-term consequences create holes that are almost impossible for them to dig out of!

If you are a parent, and if you write to parents, I hope you learn these lessons as well!

By the way, my kids brag that they have a mean mom.

grammaDawn said...

Well David...if that IS your real name, just look at this crazy mixed up world. It's more than obvious that there aren't enough 'mean moms' in it. If there were, we would have less crime, more respect, less drugs, more hard working adults, more honesty and more kindness in it. My girls are grown and having kids of their own and each have apologized for thinking I was mean and promise they will be at least as mean to their children.
As you can see by the response, you're in really good company.

ErinQ said...

Okay, I wish I had time to read all the comments because they are great, but I don't. This may already have been said. David, I believe you are a chauvinist pig who wants to propagate the "perfect mommy" paradigm. Mothers make mistakes, and by sharing them with each other and laughing about them, we help each other. In your imaginary world every woman is a Betty Draper who is hopelessly unable to confide imperfections to a friend and despairs in silence while becoming completely disengaged from her children. Also, how stupid are you to try and piss off a bunch of moms? Don't know you know that while the man is the "head of the house" the woman is the next that turns the head? That's right, a useful nugget from My Big Fat Greek Wedding. And yes, according to my 3-year old, I'm a mean mom for not letting him have gum instead of brushing his teeth.

Ally said...

I'm guessing that David doesn't have kids.... On a related note, my daughter's first phrase was "mean to me!"

Our Funny Little Family said...

ARGGGGHHHH This made me instantly angry! As a relatively new stay at home mother/blogger you are one of my heroes! I can only hope that when I am dealing with children and not babies anymore I will have maintained some shred of dignity, humor and adulthood! I am already a "mean mother" for giving my daughter a banana and cheerios for breakfast instead of the M&Ms she so desperately wanted. And she's only 18 months old!

In my opinion, David is allowed to judge us only after he has pushed another human being out of his penis, and then spent the next 20 years of his life not sleeping. Oh and also he can grow a pair (of boobs) to feed his perfect offspring. Get back to us then David!

LeMira said...

I recently read in the news that there are some people trying to create a sarcasm mark that indicates when you are being sarcastic when you write because it's too hard to tell when someone's being sarcastic. That was the dumbest thing I'd heard of or seen (there was a picture of said mark in the article) until I read David's email. I guess there are people who need that "punctuation mark."

Amy The Mom said...

mean moms unite!!

Jessica said...

Oh, I am a mean mom. I make my kids earn their computer time. LOL They much get on the treadmill or do some other form of physical activity.

I am a mean mom because I don't just buy them anything they want. If they want something, they have to earn it. Yup, clean out the garage. (and they do it too, with out complaint)

I am a mean mom because ever since my kids were little, they were in their room by 8...don't have to go to bed, you just have to be out of my face....they are now 20, 16 and 14, and that rule is still enforced.

Yup, I'm a meanie. But my kids love me.

Renny said...

I'm not a mom.
I read your blog every day so I can judge you for your poor parenting so when I am a mom I will be much better, and my children will never call me mean since I'll be perfect.
Thank you David, for pointing out the ugly truth.

(There is no possible way my comment is sarcastic.)

Rachel said...

I'm sure David is merely (very)uneducated.

You are sarcastic in a refreshing way. I can't believe this--because even if David really read just ONE of your blog posts, he'd realize you employ literary devices he probably can't even spell in order to bring humor to the hum-drum of everyday life.

What a jerk David is!!!

D said...

Apparently David's mother was not mean enough!

It is my every intention that my children turn out to be good, loving, productive citizens of this world. I also do not believe that goal is achievable without a strong sense of loving but firm guidance.

Life is not fair but life lessons taught with consequences, guided by love and flavored with humor can teach a child are more valuable than words can describe.

My 13 year old became angry after getting caught in a lie about her whereabouts while planning an outing with a friend. When told she could not go - she took off while my husband and I were at my son's Kempo belt ceremony(with assistance from this friend's mother who would not even answer her phone or door during the search for my daughter).

After getting the police involved, finding her hiding in the bathroom at the local skating rink and literally having to drag her drama queen but out of a girls bathroom stall.....

She went home.
she was grounded until the dawn of a new world.
She was made to pack up ALL of her belongings (including all the crap on her walls).
She was made to pack up ALL of her clothes but three pairs of jeans and seven shirts, underwear and tennis shoes.
She was left with a bed, pillows, blanket and one week's worth of clothes and 4-blank walls.

She had to earn everything back.

At 18 - even she says I did the right thing and she doesn't know what in the world she was thinking when she did that.

She is getting ready to attend college next spring to become a teacher. She is loving, responsible, works a full time job and is preparing for graduation from high school as I type this.

This is just one of many events along the life paths of my four - very responsible and loving children's lives.

Boy - could I make Daffy David's hair stand on end with stories!

Rock on Mean Mom's of the world....Without humor we're all sunk!

megwild said...

I don't think "David" has kids. I'm sure he is one of those obnoxious people who love to tell everyone else how to live, but have no idea what they are talking about. I love your blog and your humor.

D said...

In of my mothering mottos is:

If you don't make your children mad at you at least once a aren't doing your job!

Robin said...


I think you need to push a child out of your vagina and then talk to me about being a parent! I'm pretty sure this action reserves me the right to embarrass, laugh at and play with my awesome child any way I see fit. Thank you so much for helping me realize that if I don't instill a sense of humor into him at a young age he may take life too seriously and end up like you!

Have a nice life yourself, and try to loosen up!

Robin said...


I think you need to push a child out of your vagina and then talk to me about being a parent! I'm pretty sure this action reserves me the right to embarrass, laugh at and play with my awesome child any way I see fit. Thank you so much for helping me realize that if I don't instill a sense of humor into him at a young age he may take life too seriously and end up like you!

Have a nice life yourself, and try to loosen up!

Donna said...

I don't think David has kids. That or else he absolutely no sense of humor. All Moms are "Mean" and were dubbed that by their children. Has he already forgotten his childhood? And if we don't find the journey amusing it will just make us cry.

Robin said...


I think you need to push a child out of your vagina and then talk to me about being a parent! I'm pretty sure this action reserves me the right to embarrass, laugh at and play with my awesome child any way I see fit. Thank you so much for helping me realize that if I don't instill a sense of humor into him at a young age he may take life too seriously and end up like you!

Have a nice life yourself, and try to loosen up!

edith said...

My brother and his wife say, "People without children still exist under the delusion that they are nice people."
The world needs more parents who will fight brattiness in all its forms. Up with Meanies!

Jen said...

A mean mom, is a mom who cares on more levels than David is even capable of. May his children have a mean mom of their own. We'll be here for her. :-)

Trish said...

Clearly David is scared to think about what his Mom said about him when he was throwing tantrums, her hair all a mess while you the brat ran around and wouldn't listen with only her 2 hours of sleep. She had every nice thing to say, and never had a place to just laugh for a moment, vent her frustrations of being a MEAN MOM, or to just get a moment to herself. By the way David put your big boy panties on and stop throwing a fit!! You have a nice life!!


thetraywicks said...

What a child doesn't receive he can seldom later give. ~P.D. James, Time to Be in Earnest

Poor, Poor David.

Andrea said...

Obviously David does not have children and does not have a sense of humor.

~ My 3 sOnS ~ said...

I am a mean mom, just ask my kids! Right after you ask them if Im mean, ask them who loves them the most. Im mean because I dont give in to their every demand, I dont let them disrespect others and I dont ignore bad behavior. On the other side of that, there is not a day that goes by that I dont hug them, kiss them and tell them how much I love them. IF that makes me a mean mom, I am proud to be!! This blog makes me laugh, and helps me remeber to look at things with a little more humor....something this guy really needs to learn!

4handfulls said...

The sarcasm gene must have skipped right by him.

midnight hysteria said...

ya know ... what is really more shocking than david's comments is that you wonderful moms/grammas/aunts/women see the need to defend yourselves ...

truly, why waste all this time on this dweeb when we can be meaner to our kids .... we need to tell him en masse: GET A LIFE -- CLICK SOMEWHERE ELSE ...

life is just too short for this crap (oppps, sorry for that word -- do i GET to go to my room now???)

jana ... great blog; my day does not begin till i read your blog and nei nei, cjane ...

Heidi G said...

Your blog depicts the absurdity and hilarity that is motherhood. The day in and day out humilation that our children heap on us (vomiting on us on planes, pointing and of course commenting loudly at the unlovelies around us, lying to our face while maintaining their innocent cherubic faces, etc.). If we didn't laugh, we'd cry. Our children grow up to be funloving, responsible citizens who can laugh at their past and actually have a childhood worth remembering. I'm sorry, David, that your parents did not instill in you the ability to laugh and the everyday absurdities of life. Please don't have children.

Misty said...

LOVE LOVE LOVE your blog! And thanks to David for providing such a hilarious email for all of us to enjoy! Seriously just made my day!

Anonymous said...

In all fairness to David, maybe you should agree to stop posting things about your children when your children stop giving you fodder for your blog. Sounds fair? But until that time comes, keep blessing us with your light hearted look at motherhood. Why else would we keep coming back for more every day?

When you feel like your kids have pushed you right to the brink, just grab their little cheeks, look into their eyes and say "FOR THIS, I HAVE STRETCHMARKS." Makes it all worthwhile in the end doesn't it?

linda said...

Oh giggle.
In my long, and i do mean "long" time of being a just regular insane weird strange person, i have found that people who point fingers are usually the real target...hiding behind their useless moaning and groaning.
Now see, you pointed first! So, all those "mean moms" you just ticked off? You are one big FOOL! You don't mess with mammas.

HW said...

Jana might be a mean mom (as are we, her readers) but you have to hand it to her; it's pretty nice of her not to have posted your e-mail address.

Imagine, David, if your e-mail crashed due to notes from angry mothers. Because, you see, you've done something that most men, at some point in their lives, learn is very dangerous. You've attacked us on our most passionate and fierce front. You've attacked us as mothers. And you've done it on a blog that has many many readers.

Most men who have children would simply shake their heads at you and say "Dude. We can't help you. You're sunk" Because when you say we are bad mothers you are saying we do not love our children and that we are not doing our very best in raising them.

Next time why don't you just sneak into the woods, wake a sleeping grizzly and start poking her cub with a stick. You might fare better.

Have a nice life indeed.

Bradley, DeAnna, and Donovan said...

Wow. Really? Even my sweet little grandma was considered a mean mom at some point. I haven't been called mean yet, but my 2 year old has informed my husband that I'm crazy. I guess enforcing rules and time outs is "abhorent and malicious". I think I'll keep doing what I do. My child may be a pill when it's just him and me and home, but when we're in public he's a great kid that rarely throws tantrums because he knows it's not acceptable and I won't tolerate it. Please tell me that makes me a "Mean Mom"!! I'm grateful that I had a mean mom. Kids need rules, sometimes you have to be "mean" to enforce them. I'm with everyone else, endure a 9 month pregnancy, hours of labor, and stay home full time with a toddler...and then you can give me advice/criticize my parenting methods. I'd rather not raise entitled, spoiled, bratty children.

Leca said...

Ummm... clearly this guy has never spent any time alone with small children. David, please go and pick up four small elementary children and take them home with your for one weekend. Then lets see what song you're singin'.

We mom's need all the support we can get. If you can blow off a little steam through humor-- it's way better than actually killing your kid. Duh!

I'm outraged for you. Blog on my friend-- blog on!

Anonymous said...

As always the "meanest moms" are the ones that enforce the rules and good behavior so hopefully our children will be respectful and productive adults in the future.

We are the ones that are dragging our kids out of the store kicking and screaming because they weren't allowed a candy bar, or not allowing them to wear 3" heels to school with the matching mini skirt that shows too much, etc. etc.

The new generation of kids nowadays are all lazy little twits that don't have to work for anything and always have an excuse as to why it's not their fault and there parents are there backing them up making excuses.

So as the saying goes in our house "Suck it up buttercup" for the kids, or if it's me talking to myself in my head "Get your head out of your @## and grow up".

A mother of a 6, 8, 17, and 19yr old.

Angie said...

I bet it's super easy to be a perfect and completely humane parent when you have never had or possibly even met a child.

Diana said...

I don't know about David, but I wonder if he truly has any children. I don't think until you have children can you find humor in being a "mean Mom", because you aren't there to be your kids best friend. Your job as a Mom or Dad is to parent them and often that makes you "mean". I am sure every time my son asks for an extra candy RIGHT before bed time or wants to run into the street for pleasure and I don't go along with what he wants, he probably thinks I am horrid and mean. Go figure, I want my child to be healthy and live another day. Damn I am so mean!

Along the way we also humor ourselves in having fun like getting identical shoes that your child threw/hid away because all of a sudden they don't like because them. We do this to teach a lesson and for our own sanity or so we don't cry/pull our hair out of our heads.

You want to name a mean Mom, then why doesn't go after a Mom that lets their kids do whatever they want, when they want and how they want. I say thats a mean Mom, because those kids grow up to be selfish, bossy, over opinionated monsters that no one wants to be around.

I'll take the mean Mom badge any day and wear it proudly. It makes me a good parent.

Sarah Osborne said...

Oh, this is funny :) I am not a mother (yet)...but, I found your blog the other day and it is hysterical! I love your blog, because I am constantly telling my husband that our future children will not like me when they are young (aka they will have rules, they will not hit or throw things or run into the street or leave their room looking like a tornado). I am positive that your blog will be even funnier when I get my first little babe. You take the funny tantrums of your children with a grain of salt...seems like the best way for a mom to keep her sanity and not BECOME MEAN. I haven't read any posts of hitting, name calling, or anything else that a realistic person could latch onto as actually being "mean." Keep up the work as a FABULOUS mom!

Ashley Welling said...

I think he is just jealous because his mom didn't love enough like we love our children. I feel sorry for the guy.

I don't have children of my own, but as a teacher I have 255 of them. I love tormenting them the same way I would my own child.

Miss Ellaneous said...

I'm 15 years old and the proud offspring of a "Mean Mom". I have/had (depends on how old you consider a 15 year old) an awesome childhood because of her and her "meanness". "Mean Moms" are the best, they make being a kid fun. I feel sorry if David didn't have one or doesn't appreciate his.

BTW, I seriously doubt David even has kids.

the mrs. said...

Happy Mother's Day, you meanies!
Keep up the good work.

Cindy said...

If David would come and spend a day at my house with my kids he would have a whole new appreciation for why I am so awful.
Seriously, does he have a sense of humor because mine is the only thing that has kept me from completely losing my mind in the past 5 years.

Shannon said...

I love HM's comment. Very well put. And Michelle (with the stick comment) made me laugh. I am looking forward to reading David's article. Could you please ask him to send you a link when he has finished it? Thanks.

Lahni said...

To all the previous comments: HEAR, HEAR!!

Jenny said...

david- just because you have a small penis, doesnt mean you have to ruin everyone elses fun. thanks.

Gabrielle Mappone said...

David is clearly NOT a parent and is just a student doing research. Maybe when he becomes an adult and have regular interactions with children, he will understand humor and how to cope.

I don't post much. But I am a parent and a teacher and your musings help me survive the day!

Megan said...

Hi David,

I can't read all the posts, but I sure hope you take the time to do so...there is nothing harder AND more rewarding than caring for our children...and if you are naieve enough to think it happens without some "meanness", than there is little we can say to convince you otherwise...

Being Mean is a "badge" given, not it or not, someone out there thinks you're "mean" you want to explain yourself to someone who has no CLUE what went behind whatever action they misunderstood???? Well, welcome to the world of children...they misunderstand our protective, logical, never ending services and so is the life of a Mother...

I hope you go and tell YOUR Mother how perfect she is, was and always will be tomorrow...I'm sure she was never mean :)

Happy Mothers Day!!

Kim Ginsberg said...

I'm not wasting my time responding to David. I feel that everyone else (all 191 comments and counting while I post)have shown David our plight.
So, to all you fellow "Mean Moms" out there - Happy Mothers Day! We all deserve it! Cheers!

sarahandmatt said...

Dear David,

It is apparent you have no children.

For the record, our children love us and we love them. They lead happy lives full of the crazy hectic reality that is growing up in a family with small children. These are the years they will fondly look back on and laugh, "Can you believe Mom did that?"

I hope that as you mature and gain life experience, you will realize that so many of the challenges we face in life are best handled with a little bit of humor. I also hope you will realize that writing negative letters to young mothers, already sacrificing so much of themselves to raise and mould young human lives is not going to be received kindly.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY, ya little brat!

the emily said...

You have to be mean. At least with my kids. They listen to mean, not nice.

Anonymous said...

Not only is David unfamiliar with irony, I also question his ability to recognize creative writing. Jana, keep up the great work - both as a mother (obviously loving and devoted)as demonstrated by the many activities and loving attention displayed to your children, and as a writer (creative and topnotch)as demonstrated by the great stories you present here on an almost daily basis. David, chill out, grow up, perhaps even learn something here, or at least the very least move on.

Diva Ma @ Mommy Fabulous said...

I'm so sure that when David has children and tries to raise the "the nice way" he will understand why it is so necessary to be a little mean to raise well rounded children with a sense of reality. TSK TSK, David. Get a clue!

Pam :-) said...

A true journalist would never write such judgmental and mean email. He's probably an intern assigned to dig up leads. Either way, if you'd like help reverse-engineering his email to find his boss, I would love to help. Someone like that should not be allowed to get away with that kind of behavior! Pam :-)

mom o' boys said...

I guess David doesn't understand sarcasm or telling the wild tales of motherhood with the brilliant sense of humor that you have. Ha! Love all the responses. Write on, friend! Apparently, there are quite a few of us reading.

Jennifer said...

David obviously doesn't have children. And never was one. The End.

Yules said...

David, go look up STFU. and do it. have a nice life.

Sheryl said...

David reminds me of the character from You've Got Mail who lived with Meg Ryan and found great satisfaction from his self important editorials.
I have 8 children. Once I let my first grader go to school wearing a turtle neck and jeans on a 90 degree day. The school's air conditioning was out and the school had begged the parents to send their children to school wearing shorts and tee shirts because of the heat. Why did I let her wear that? Because she was stubborn and that's what she said she'd wear, no matter what I said. I didn't argue, I said, "Okay wear what you want". When the teacher called at about noon saying my daughter was sweating, uncomfortable, and needed some cooler clothes. I laughed. I said, "I'll think about it." The teacher knew my daughter and laughed too. She said,"Please, I can't stand it". I brought her clothes. But, I didn't want to. She needed to learn to listen to me.
My children are mostly grown now. I was a tough mom. But, they adore me.

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