December 31, 2010

Sea Monkey Massacre



This weekend, we are moving into our new house.

Needless to say, our current residence looks like the aftermath of a hurricane.

While everyone else was loading the truck, Cortlen decided that it was just as good of time as any to open up one of his Christmas presents: a plastic tank full of sea monkeys.

"Not now," I told him when he asked me to help him fill the plastic aquarium full of water.

"We can mess with the sea monkeys tomorrow," I promised. "Definitely not today."

My son is s good listener and I could have predicted what happened next.

A few minutes later, Cortlen emerged from the bathroom wringing his hands in anguish.

The water came out of the faucet faster than expected and flushed all the sea monkey embryos down the drain.

"I killed them all!" he cried.

I tried to be sympathetic, but it was hard. On Christmas morning, Kellen tripped over a box and dropped his aquarium on my living room rug. Three thousand sea monkeys lost their lives in the accident.

"You're happy!" Cortlen wailed. "Stop smiling!" he screamed.

That was almost twelve hours ago.

If you've ever had sea monkeys at your house, you know why I'm still smiling.

Happy New Year!

28 comments

Mrs. Tuna said...

Fortunately, I have escaped any foray into the world of sea monkeys.

Diane said...

No sea monkeys here, but every year my MIL sends my boys radio control crap. It doesn't take long for them to break. I wish she would stop.

Beth @ Sand To Pearl said...

Hehehe, sound like our house a few years ago, we had sea monkeys, they were doing really well, and with the way our house is set up we'd put them by the front sliding glass door to get some sun, and our Home Teacher came over and kicked it over. Yep, he felt horrible, but my husband and I were fine with it. And our daughter simply said "Does that mean we don't get to flush them down the toilet?"

Watashi no Uchi said...

Hahaha! Ours died pretty quickly! We hated them! I was hoping they would all die after my 4 year old tried to feed them a doughnut, but the boogers just stayed alive in the murky water for a couple of months. One day I accidentally dropped the tank in the sink and lost them all! haha!

Julie said...

So funny, I remember when I was in second grade and probably had my sea monkey aquarium for a couple days. Next thing I remember was accidentally pouring a packet of Carnation Instant Breakfast into the tank.
Death By Chocolate took on a whole new meaning!

Angela said...

I don't know what sea monkeys are... But I love that pic at the top of your post :)

Anonymous said...

Yea, what are sea monkeys?!?

Liz said...

Perhaps we're just sea monkey-stupid at my house, but I bought some a few years ago & we did exactly what the package said & we never saw ANYTHING in the water that even remotely appeared to be living. I know they're teeny, but we saw NOTHING. We flushed whatever was (or wasn't?) in there & said "forget it!" about a month or so after we first got them.

Mrs. Ohtobe said...

You know how they always find a 18 foot rogue gator in the sewers - now we have to worry his little sea monkeys are next! ;) Happy New Year!

Bella @ If This is Motherhood said...

Ahhh, my son got Prehistoric Triopa for Christmas lol. It doesn't look like they are going to start moving anytime soon, but I guess we'll see.

Bella @ If This is Motherhood said...

Prehistoric Triops LOL....sorrry ...typing in the dark

Vicky said...

Should've gotten him a goldfish! Then again, outcome could've been the same!
Happy New Year!

Anonymous said...

I've just googled sea monkeys, seen some really ugly creatures on wikipedia...I can see why you smiled at losing them all!

Just Plain Tired said...

I'd imagine 2010 will go down as the year of the "lost sea monkeys". I've never had any and can't imagine ever possessing any. Happy New Year and good luck with the move!

myevil3yearold said...

What? Sea monkeys? I feel this is some joke you are all pulling on me! I have never heard of these before. Probably, a good thing. I have managed to kill every living thing I have ever had except my two kids.

Kerrie said...

There's a spot on the carpet I'm always afraid something will get spilled on. Because our sea monkeys "escaped" there and they don't die, they just dehydrate. I have nightmares of them re hydrating and coming to get us in the middle of the night.

Jen said...

Oh no! We got sea monkeys for Christmas and have just started the process of growing them. Tomorrow we have to put in the eggs. I'm getting worried this may be a horrible joke on me by the gift giver.

qandlequeen said...

Stopping by to wish you a happy new year!

Lori said...

Sea Monkeys loved our house--lasting about seven or eight months until we moved and I told my daughter that we had to put them down the storm drain so that they could go see the world.

A year later: she still asks if they've been following us to places like Disneyland or SF.

Leca Unplugged said...

Ugh! I HATE sea monkeys! We had some at our house from a well meaning grandparent and it was a total mess. She over fed them within a day and they all "died" rather quickly. Never again!

teamredfern said...

Next time just go for the butterfly kit instead. It was a huge hit at our house and the kids didn't even seem to mind when one butterfly was eaten by a bird as soon as we released it. We even heard the gulp.

One more quarter for the therapy bucket.

Nelson's Mama said...

My daughter had Sea Monkeys for nearly a year - I finally persuaded her to feed them to her sister's dwarf-African frog!

Chad & Cassidy said...

My son was luck enough to get "Prehistoric Tripos" aka Sea Monkeys from Santa this year. While reading this post I couldn't help but laugh! My son decided to open up the bag of "eggs" right over Dad's bowl of scrambled eggs.... Dad claims the eggs looked like pepper- so he ate a few. Eewww! So far none of them have hatched, at least not that we can see. Hopefully the ones in Dads belly didn't hatch either.

Shawn said...

Maybe I missed something...what's so bad about Sea Monkeys?

Renate Hunter said...

I just googled it--how can I not have heard of these before???? So thankful that my kids never did either.....OMG I feel so blessed not to have known about this.....

Anonymous said...

I had sea monkeys when I was 19. I loved them! Damn things wouldn't die no matter how much I neglected them. I raise my children using the same principals. This way when Armageddon comes they will be ready. :)

Kerry Crawford said...

Aaack! My 6-year-old got Sea Monkeys on Christmas morning. In the 5 weeks since that glorious moment when we dumped the magic powder into the water, we have learned some things about Sea Monkeys that we didn't know before:

1. When they're attached together, that means they're making baby sea monkeys.
2. Six adult sea monkeys can produce about a zillion little tiny sea monkeys in very short order without anyone even noticing.
3. A 6-year-old can be such a good caretaker of sea monkeys that unless we flush them or stop feeding them, we will have sea monkeys mating in our kitchen forever and ever and ever.

Anonymous said...

Yes, really? I loved my Sea Monkeys when I was small... Some of you are meanie heads, no regard for life... ;)