February 2, 2011
The Expert
I've always wanted to be an expert on something people care about. That's why I got my doctorate in medieval literature.
As it turns out, I grossly overestimated the popularity of The Canterbury Tales.
This week, I've been given a second chance. I can say with a tremendous amount confidence that I know more about marine otters and their habitats than most people in America.
For the first time in my life, I feel whole.
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What endangered animal/historical figure/national park/U.S. President is your subject of specialty?
As long as it's not the marine otter, we can be friends.
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right now, it's dinosaurs. my 4 year old daughter is obsessed. and my hubs thinks it's really cool. it's to the point where i google stuff after she tells me dino facts because i don't really believe she can possibly know that much...but what she says is always true.
but the tides may be turning...today she correctly told me that Jupiter is the largest planet in our solar system. (and now i know that is really true because i googled it after she left the room.)
Hmmm. I'm not sure I'm an expert on anything yet. Definitely not sea otters.
Ha! You are funny. I'm getting to be an expert in being a doofus. When I do things right or actually know something that could help someone, I think, wait, I'll ruin my reputation . . .
I recently became an expert in Africa....well one small obscure village in Africa...what the villagers eat, what their houses are built out of...what a baraza is...pretty confident I could go fact to fact with you and the otter. Test is today....thank goodness!
Just about all things fish, dog, and cat...
That's my area :)
Dinosaurs in this house. In the past weeks I have been quizzed over and over on their Latin name definitions. It can drive a person to drink.
Old movies and obscure bands. That's my area. I can really rock the pop culture section in Trivial Pursuit. Sadly, all the other pie pieces are unattainable to me.
I hear you! Who cares about Hebrew verb forms anymore in my life? What I know about now is penguins--all 16 species, from fairy blue to emperor king.
Meerkats! Yea, we can be friends. :)
Nothing. Wow, that's sad to say. I think I'll need to make it my life goal now to find something. :)
Teenage girls - even whole packs of them. They no longer scare me at all.
Cheetas, hump back whales and Utah. And now that I have one in high school, Latin verbs.
Wow, sad day for me. I just spent the past 5 minutes trying to figure out what I'm an expert at. Not good. Perhaps identifying foreign objects in my children's diapers?
I love The Canterbury Tales. I have a copy on my shelf right now that I'm going to read out loud in the Middle English. So soothing! I mean, who isn't a fan of Chaucer?
Funny Stuff I Write
I learned quite a bit about Jackie Robinson in December for biographies - what an amazing man! I'm on to Squanto, stay tuned!
My husband and I continue to argue about the defintion of a prefix. And we are once again super skilled at multiplication tables (0-12). Third grade rocks.
I'm sure my mom used to be an expert on a lot of things, until I drove her crazy and she forgot it all.
I remember one time she was helping me learn all the presidents in order, and all the states in alphabetical order, and then the states in the order in which they came into the union. a lot of times she rented schoolhouse rock to help teach me things.
btw i just started reading your blog and i kept clicking 'older entries' until i eventually read them all. you've been keeping me entertained for almost a week. my husband is getting sick of me talking about how funny this blog is.
Any Army weapon, construction vehicles, and legos. I also make a mean train track for Thomas.
Meal worms. Sigh. I have the three stages in my guest room right now and the science fair was two weeks ago....wondering how I can dispose of them.
I'm an expert on Pinewood Derby Cars. I bet we can be friends now, right?
Seriously, my area of expertise is being able to determine the grade of fever without a thermometer. I never thought much of it until we were at Disney World and had to make a trip to the First Aid station. I told them I put my son's temp around 102.5 - kissed him again and said maybe it was SLIGHTLY higher - and asked them to check it. Temp? 102.8. They were highly impressed...and they dosed him with too little ibuprofen. Boneheads.
It's not a medieval tune, but I happened to come across this "Sea Otter Rap" today on another blog. Coincidence? I think not! http://www.lair2000.net/Mermaid_Lyrics6/lyrics/Sea_Otter_Rap.html
Click the radio button at the end of the lyrics to play the song. (And move your cursor around for some animated sea-critters!)
Happy Sea Otter Expert-ing! beth.
Apollo 11. Spent 2 days researching and reading every last aspect I could find. Gave the reading to my 5th grader to review so we could do his project. He replied 4 minutes later that he was done. That was a rough week.
Reindeer. Did you know they are the only deer that can be domesticated? Females have antlers too? AND..a day old calf can out run a man? AND did you also know that a 7 yr old boy who has to stand up in front of the class and present this information has zero control over his feet? Yup, it was 3 minutes of watching him do the 'this foot that foot' dance. Wish I could have found a reindeer for a 'prop'. hardy har har
current topic of (forced by school) expertise: chemistry.
George Washington. We have the same birthday. Also, overhead squats.
Well, after a thrilling 90 minute documentary on the Panama Canal last week, I feel I know more than the average Joe. Why I'll ever need that knowledge? No. Clue.
I know all 50 states in alphabetical order AND their capitals. That actually comes in quite handy from time-to-time.
I also have a good knowledge base of American history as a whole, Colonial Days to present. I'm especially fond of the pioneer years and the Depression era.
That's all I've got. I'm a decent partner for a trivia game and I've got a wicked vocabulary...probably form all of that reading!
Sumer is ycomen in
Loude sing cuckou!
Groweth seed and bloweth meed,
And springth the wode now.
Sing cuckou!
My favorite word in the whole song is "verteth" but you can't blame me for that. You should meet my professor.
I'm an expert on sanding down junky furniture and trying to make it look like we bought it somewhere pricey.
Are you this funny in real life? Or do you have to save it all for the blog. You make me laugh every day. Thank you!
Thanks to my second son I am now an expert on all wild cats, apes and monkeys, wolves, Chief Joseph and native americans, Aztecs, atlatls, and bows and arrows. His new obsession is Ninjas, so I will soon become an expert in this area as well. This is what happens when you have a child who has to obsesively learns about different subjects of interest to him.
Hopefully by next friday I will be an expert on Bill Clinton, and my daughter will look like chelsea!
I love talking about Crater Lake. Can't say I'm an expert, but I could be a sales agent.
The great wall of China, volcanoes, and the Titanic. I am hoping we will be able to recycle some of this expertise as the other three get older, but I'm afraid to hope too much for that!
black bears. I know everything about them. and beavers.
obviously I'm from canada.
Just became an expert on the historical site La Jolla Cove. Got a 100percent on my project and oral presentation (sorry I mean my daughter did). Feel pretty good about myself.
Popular Teen Fiction....BA in English Lit and Masters in Library Science only to become obsessed with Twilight.
How about Ancient Egyptian pharaohs Cleopatra and Khufu? And I can list over 100 dinosaurs and their current names. Oh, and I know entirely too much about famous volcanic eruptions and the formation of igneous rocks.
Will my brain ever relieve itself of this critical information? Time will tell...
Benjamin Franklin. Ask me anything!
This week it's Mark Twain. Oh how I love the third grade Wax Museum:)
I am an expert in aromatherapy and the use of essential oils for therapeutic purposes. I use these skills to help people feel good naturally. I've built a successful business around it with 7 retail locations and two international franchises. But whatever about my business success, I'm just happy to be helping people the world over feel their best so that they can contribute to the world in their own unique ways.
Hilarious! Yes i should know loads about sea lions and other creatures that walk the earth but selective memory at play, forgotten everything. Just as I hear about the Warrriors (Oakland basketball team ) all day long and still think they're talking about the movie...was there a movie??
Thank goodness! I know nothing about marine otters.
I'm definitely not an expert in any of those other things either.
Narwals. Until my son was given the narwals as his assignment to become an "expert in," I honestly thought they were fictional. I mean, they are in all the holiday Christmas cartoons. Turns out they're real. Who knew?!? Well, I do now. As well as their natural habitat, mating rituals, and level on the food chain.
Panda's are my specialty for sure! And I wish I had kids to blame for this extra knowledge, but sadly it's my own theme.
The Constitution and all 27 amendments which I use to count laps when I lap swim. How to hatch ducks and geese in the house. How to research family history. Photography and teenagers in general(I teach High School social studies)
I'm an expert on everything Star Wars, thanks to my 5-year-old's current obsession with it. I never thought I'd know so much about Star Wars and every character in it!
Imaginary friends. What they like to eat, where they like to sit so I cant and how they cause all the problems and messes in the house.
Ha! I read your blog constantly, but have never posted. I got my masters in medieval lit-- I envisioned a life of reading the lais of Marie de France to my super-intelligent, well-bred children. I'm now an expert in pirates. Arrrrg.
Zombies.
That would be the American Oil Beetle (so named because of the blistering substance it oozes when it feels threatened). My children found some in the yard yesterday and we did a pretty exhaustive internet search. Funny the things you've become an expert on by the end of the day, that you didn't even know existed when you rolled out of bed that morning...
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