April 11, 2011

The Snake


Of all of the things that I want inside my screened-in porch, a big black snake is tops on my list.

Patio furniture comes in a distant second.

My kids noticed the snake while I was making dinner. "There's a big snake outside," Camber said, pointing through the window.

"That's great," I said instinctively. A few minutes earlier, she told me that she thought she had seen a grizzly bear nibbling the leaves off the palm tree in front of our house. "Or maybe it was a big dog."

I finally took my kids seriously when they produced an empty pillowcase and pair of kitchen tongs.

"I've always wanted a pet snake," Cortlen slobbered.

It took some convincing, but I agreed to let them keep the reptile. But only after it earned its keep.

My children liked my idea of putting the snake up in the attic. The rat (s) that were up there two months ago are still there.

My husband was not supportive of my plan.

The boys had a baseball game and we were running late, so sadly, we decided to postpone catching the snake until afterward.

The minute the game was over, we raced home. No snake.

My kids were heartbroken until I pointed out that there was limited access to the lanai from the outside. There is, however, a smallish hole in the screen door leading from the lanai to the inside of the house that I hadn't noticed before. They looked at me blankly when I told them this.

"That means that the snake is probably somewhere inside the house already!" I could barely contain my excitement.

My husband and I have spent the past three hours looking for the snake. I refuse to go to sleep until it is found. If we don't find it by midnight, I'm checking into the hotel down the street.

37 comments

Tonya said...

AWWWW! I would have had to call the fire department while never taking my eyes off it to make sure it didn't get in the house. Scary! scary!

Rachel said...

oh my gosh! you've got the right idea!!!

Mariska said...

No! I hate snakes. The hotel down the street wouldn't even be an option for me, it would have to be on the other side of town at least!!

Amy said...

Aaahhhhh!! I remember one time my neighbor had her couch sitting outside for a few days and when I asked her if she was getting rid of it, she said "No, just want to give the snake that slithered into it enough time to get out." Yikes!!! And we have copperheads around here, lots of them.

Laura said...

you are flat out hilarious.
never change.

thank you.

Joyful Things said...

My heart is racing and my skin clammy just thinking about that snake. I think I'd move.

The Mommy Therapy said...

Hotel. Fast.

That is disturbing!

Why don't your kids try to catch that bear in the front yard? That would be much for exicting for show and tell.

Good luck!

Jenner said...

We have a lot of snakes on our property and I've always been enchanted by them. That is... until last summer, when I was photographing one and it leapt up and attached itself to my thumb!!! Now I don't like them so much.

Anna said...

Now I have the gibblies, though not as bad as you probably do. I still have nightmares about snakes sometimes.... I hope you find it sooner rather than later!!

cpeezers said...

oh my. Just about my worst nightmare. The other day my 3 year old tried to convince me that snakes are friendly and nice. "Mommy. There is no reason to be scared. Mommy. You need to hold one." I discovered your blog recently, and I love reading your posts!

Jan said...

i am a high school math teacher. The room next door is a science room, where snakes are kept and handled by the kids. One afternoon I was reaching into my desk drawer for my purse and THERE WAS A BIG ORANGE SNAKE IN THERE! I almost grabbed it. I screamed at the top of my lungs (no kids in the classroom) and NO ONE heard me - had to run outside to get help. Snake had crawled out of cage with loose top, slithered under two doors, and parked in my drawer. Worst experience of my life!!

Mom said...

Our neighbors keep snakes. One time they lost one in the house for 4 months! The mom was certain that it had gotten out and was no longer on the premises. She was sure surprised to find it one day in a dark closet. Apparently it was so hungry after not being fed all that time that it actually bit her! Please find that snake and get rid of it...quick!
Sandy
www.twelvemakesadozen.blogspot.com

Amanda said...

Wow! I'm always amazed at how afraid of snakes people are. He doesn't look venomous or large enough to eat any of your children; so, I wouldn't worry too much. P.S. You aren't glad that snake is trying to be helpful, Jana? He must be on his way to the attic. He probably just wants the rat. :)

mom24orsinis said...

AH! AH! AHHHH!!! I just detest snakes, unlike you...I can tell no hint of sarcasm in your whole post...my snake story is: in our walkout basement, growing up, we had nice heavy curtains...my Dad decided to pull them apart one Spring day and in one of the folds, a snake slithered out...I can barely handle typing it out...

Get the handicap room at a Hampton in...it's huge!

mom24orsinis said...

edit: Hampton Inn (in case you need to look up the number, I knew you'd need the correct spelling :))

Karen said...

Well, we are all sitting here waiting...wanting to know if you found the snake or not.....I bet it just went back out into the yard the same way it came into the screened porch...and it's not in your house. I'd much rather have a black snake hanging around than a copperhead! :-)Don't black snakes keep the Copperheads away, or is that a myth?

Anonymous said...

Check your dryer. I found one once inside the silver tube behind it.

myfwbs said...

I'm with you, Jana. I'd much rather have the snake than the patio furniture too.

Brookes4boys said...

Black snakes will eat the poisonous ones. They are the lesser of the two evils, trust me. Just think of him as your own personal exterminator ;)

Nelson's Mama said...

One of the cats brought one IN the house yesterday (though he was much smaller than your snake) and that thing went AWOL for a while. My husband had to come home from work and help me catch it!

However, that was not my first rodeo (or third or fourth) with a snake in the house. ):

http://myboynelson.blogspot.com/2009/07/and-it-smelled-like.html

Niki said...

I grew up in rattle snake country. Any snake I see, dies. period. end of story.

mama loquita said...

I.WOULD.DIE
Once a cousin came visit my husband's family and brought a pet tarantula. The thing got lost in the house (4 flours and 7 bedrooms) for days. Can you imagine???????????? It's a good thing I didn't know my husband back then.

Mrs G said...

I would have paniked, Im terrifed of snakes.

Sant Family said...

This tops the list of things I hate about living in the South. (I am a transplant.) My son caught a snake in our yard the other day - but not to worry - he saw on TV how to catch it so it wouldn't bite him.

Thank goodness for a TV education. And thank goodness that one wasn't poisonous.

My favorite snake experience here is when the kids were swimming in our pool and a baby cottonmouth slithered across the yard and concrete and into the pool. The kids all jumped out so fast it was like reverse motion television. And it's harder to catch a snake in the net than you might think.

PS in my area of Louisiana there are 46 species of snakes but "only" 7 are venomous. And of course, every venomous snake has it's look alike.

Kay said...

I live in northern WI, so snakes are not a big part of life here. I know what to do if a bear or bobcat is around, but I'm not sure what to do about snakes. A friend in AZ saw a rattlesnake in her backyard, freaked and called the fire department. They came and found out the snake was dead. She felt like an idiot.

Angie said...

ick, ick, ick! I would have to sell my house. Hope you found it. The couch story killed me. Ugh.

Skubaliscious said...

We occasionally find little lizards in our house. I refuse to think about what else can get in since they can....uck.

Tammy said...

My mom always runs them over with lawn mowers when she sees them in the yard. Then she calls me to "dispose" of them:)

Lynn said...

Just thinking about your situation makes me want to check my whole house for snakes!

Itchin' Stitchin' said...

YUCK YUCK YUCK!!! There is just one thing this mom doesn't even want to think about and that is snakes!

Lisa said...

Ah, this is bringing back memories of my summer trip to Tahoe when the mouse crawled across me while I slept....Maybe if I had a snake in the house it wouldn't have! :)

Lydia Story said...

Wow! That is awesome. I'm so glad you share all these wonderfully terrifying experiences!!

Anonymous said...

How bizarre! A few weeks ago one of my kids brought one inside and decided to keep it in his room. A few days after he brought it in, it got loose. It's either somewhere in his bedroom, or my cat ate it (since I suspect she's the one that knocked over it's jar).

When I was a kid, I had a snake and it got loose. After it had been AWOL for about 6 MONTHS, I found it in my underwear drawer one day while reaching in for a pair of socks. Scared the crap outta me!

Worst case scenario story: my brothers and I caught a snake when we lived in Tracy CA. Had that thing for a year. We handled it all the time and had no issues. One day one of their friends came over and I don't know exactly what happened, but the snake bit that kid and the kid went into siezures and couldn't breathe. A neighbor drove us all to the hospital where the dr who treated him informed us he was treating the kid for rattlesnake bites! We repeatedly told the dr it wasn't a rattler, it was a non venomous pet snake. So he had us describe the snake in detail. When he asked where the snake was inside of our home, I toldhim, "Uh, well, the kid kinda flung the snake after it bit him, so it's SOMEWHERE in my room. Not sure." Dr turned so white I thought he'd faint. Turns out.....this snake was a crossbreed between the non venomous snakes and the rattlesnakes in the area. A rattlesnake without a rattle so to speak. That we'd been handling. We had some kind of animal control people searching my house for it for ages. They never found it. Heck, we never saw that thing again. Wonder where it ended up?

Candee

Nancy said...

Better call Billy the exterminator. If you haven't seen his show on TV it's a must see. He'll get rid of that snake for you.

Kristine Gray said...

Never mind the baseball games. Calling the exterminator takes priority. I wouldn't set foot in the house until it was found. I don't DO reptiles.

Beth @ Sand To Pearl said...

Creepy! Growing up my dad found a snake in the washing machine, and go figure, my laundry was in there...

Pyratess said...

That little old thing is just a harmless indigo. It is non venomous and it is protected by the state of Florida. They DO eat venomous snakes so keep the guy around. here is a link http://www.floridabackyardsnakes.com/EasternIndigo.html
IT could also be a racer but I doubt it. Racers don't stay still long. here is a link to a racer.
Either snake is harmless.
here is a link on the racer http://www.floridabackyardsnakes.com/SouthernBlackracer.html
Anyway... it will not harm you or your kids. so go to sleep.