May 17, 2011

Mommy Math



I was driving through my neighborhood this afternoon when something out of the ordinary caught my eye. Or rather a lot of somethings.

I slammed on the brakes.

"Are those our balls?" I asked my offspring. I pointed to the eight objects floating in the middle of a large retention pond in the distance.

I sent one of my kids on a scouting mission. He came back with a Duke basketball under his arm.

"Every ball we own is out there," I said matter-of-factly. "How in the world did they get there?"

No one could explain the specifics. All they knew was that if you shoved an object down the storm drain that it would eventually end up in the pond behind the neighbors' houses.

"Everyone owes me a million dollars," I said.

That should cover the replacement cost of the balls, plus pain and suffering.

19 comments

Mommom said...

Bet the balls smell good after being in the retention pond.

Sara Bell said...

Eight balls times four children times one house payment times one vehicle times 300 gallons of gas times... yeah, a million each sounds about right.

RoryBore said...

Oh my. I will definitely pay closer attention next time my brood is crouching over the storm drain. although, I could use the extra cash....

The Mommy Therapy said...

I don't even think a million dollars covers it.

Kids are nuts.

I mean, it's hilarious for the rest of us, but I'm sure it's super frustrating for you!

Bethany said...

Perfect response.
Owing a million dollars.
Purely fabulous.

Emily Heizer Photography said...

@ Mommom: Ewwwwwww

You are so insightful.

Jenner said...

Wow, who would have thought it?

manda said...

Thank you, Your writing has helped me,,
i like this blog,,
By Diet Solution Program

Beth said...

Makes you wonder why they didn't just stop with ONE ball, doesn't it? At least it was an educational experience! :)

SeriousMom said...

So who retrieved the balls??

Mom of 12 said...

I'm thinking I might just head over to WalMart and replace the balls with some of that million dollars...
Sandy

mom24orsinis said...

you're preaching to the choir...we have a pond in the backyard, with many families houses backing up to it...only OUR balls are ever floating in it :( sigh....

Lisa said...

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! That is so awesome! I love your kids!

Cuddles, Kisses & Tantrums said...

maybe they just wanted the gators to have something to play with.

Selin said...

lol @mommom
I dont even want to imagine how nice it smelt....e.wwww

Jennifer said...

This reminds me of my son...he has a set of Dr. Suess alphabet flash cards that fit nicely into the little decorative slots in the fake kitchen drawer face under the sink. Every time I put something in the recycling, I am bombarded with Dr. Suess creatures. When we replaced our dishwasher recently, we discovered where the rest of the set had gone. Well, most of it. He probably didn't need to learn the letter S anyway.

Laura ( www.laurainthesky.com ) said...

HAHAHAHA! This makes me laugh on so many levels! Your kids are hilareous!

Jeani said...

Very nice blog. I would like to visit again sometimes. Thanks

The Mama said...

This sounds exactly like something my kids would do. my sympathies :)