January 27, 2009

The First Waffle

The only waffle that counts in our house is the one that comes out of the waffle iron first. The second and third specimens not only taste disgusting, but are infected with waffle # 1's germs.

"I'm not touching that!" screamed Kellen when I handed him his plate.

He treated waffle #2 as if it was radioactive.

"Get out of here!" he cried, as he flipped the waffle off his plate with his fork.

Cortlen didn't mind the taste of toxic chemicals and reached across the table. He ate the discarded breakfast item in three quick bites.

"You ate the second waffle!" wailed Kellen. "Now I have to have the last one!"

The realization that he was the Old Maid hit the little guy hard.

***

Anyone obsessed with being first in line at your house?

29 comments

Jen said...

Being first into the bathroom in the morning is like a race around here. I have chosen to wisely get out of bed first, so I do not participate (cuz I win!) but, it is fun to watch......

Rebecca said...

My boys are allergic to baths so being last is the coveted spot. They think whoever I send first and second is obviously not as loved as the one that gets to wear their dirt the longest.

Reese said...

For us, it isn't so much about being first. We have three barstools and of course there is only one that is worth sitting in. The first thing out of their mouths in the morning is, "I get THE chair!", followed by a mass stampede to the kitchen. Of equal importance is the color of bowl, cup, or plate they are served on. (I should have been smarter and gotten them all in one shade) You would honestly think the world had ceased to exist on the days one of them misses out on having a turn in THE chair or being served on the wrong color of plate.

Lisa said...

Now I am totally craving waffles... :)

Robbie said...

With my two, it's who can get out the front door first. And if you get out before the boy, be prepared to peel yourself off the ground. He will do whatever need be to get to the (still locked) truck first! Lucky for me, I'm the last one there...and the truck doesn't get unlocked till I get there! ;)

Cindy said...

Nope--that's why we have a child of the day every day except Sunday. So if there's any discussion, they know it's Baby A on Monday, B on Tuesday, and so forth. It's like my little trump card...

Stormie said...

Wow your kids sure do sound a LOT like my 2! Not only do they fight about who gets served first, but they swear I give one of them more food than the other. Even though I measure out their food & know its even just so I can prevent future fights. Too bad it a re-occuring argument, lol

Ilana said...

I am impressed that you even make waffles! I go frozen all the way.

Lori said...

When my son was five he attended hockey camp. He REALLY wanted to be first in his line for each drill. Everytime the coach would pull them aside to explain a new drill, he would stand about 100 feet away so he could race back to the starting point. Of course this meant he didn't hear the coach explain the drill. I couldn't get him to figure out how stupid he was going to look being the first one to do the drill and having no idea what the drill was.

Blog Buddy said...

In our house-it's a race to the front seat of our mini-van. All teens who don't make the cut...stand outside my car stomping their feet. Luckily, we have many drivers, lots of ancient cars, and we live in a small town. Walking is also a good way to get to church:)

HW said...

Well, my daughter is 14 and she's learned she has to get to the good food first (pizza, girl scout cookies) or her 17-year old brother will have inhaled it. Last year she clearly marked two boxes of girl scout cookies "Keep Out, Blake and friends!!"

That Girl in Brazil said...

For us it's who shuts the car door. And gets THE BLUE PLATE. And gets out of the tub first. And gets sunscreen on first.

And

And

And ....

Tattooed-Midget-Freak said...

We have an adorable 4 year-old who insists on being "middle". She wants the middle plate, the middle serving, etc.

To curb the insane issues the arise from the other 2 children being first, we end up choosing a "first" for the day and it is usually the one who is whining the least.

Anita said...

My kids are nuts about some things. I think my girls, who are twins, have been battling since conception....ie, I had to have a c-section because they were fighting to get out first and neither of their little heads would engage!! Now they race to see who can eat first and then gets control of the coveted bathroom spot....ugh. BTW, they are nearly 16, so my hopes for your 5 year olds are not too high, sorry.
I did make waffles today, and they were all eaten, none slower than others. It's my now 11 year olds birthday today.

Crystal said...

lol waffles Ill gladly take #2! I gave u an award!

Michelle said...

Oh yeah, my kids have to be first for everything. My dh has started telling the child that yells "me first" that they are now last. It's cut down a bit on the me first situation, but it still glares it's nastiness on occassion.

MLB Studios said...

Oh goodness, YES! I have three. 13, 9 and 7 and to this day ALL three RACE out of the front door and to the car. They HAVE to be the first there and the first in. They have to be the first to the table, the first to the shower, everything seems to be a competition around here to be the first.... Maddening!

Karen said...

Since I ALWAYS seem to destroy the first waffle trying to get it off the iron, this is not an issue here. No one in my house ever wants the first waffle.

The kids though do argue about who does everthing else first including going to the bathroom. There is much pushing & shoving around here to see who gets to pee first. I can't blame my daughter on this one though. My son is not especially neat in the bathroom. I wouldn't want to go after him either.

wannabee free said...

who doesn't?

Malea said...

First kid with his thumbs up on the table after "GO" is said by my one year old gets to say prayer on the food.

Sheila said...

Everything is a competition at our house, first to go to the bathroom, first to get jammies on, first to get in their car seat, first up the stairs, you get the idea. It's the only way we can "encourage" our oldest to do anything and now we've created a monster.

Heather said...

We race up the stairs to get ready for bedtime. Our short legged Jack Russell races as well, growling and biting pant hems and socks the whole way. I tell the kids that she needs all the help she can get due to her size.

We also have a buckle race in the car to see who can get their seat belt (or car seat buckle) done up the fastest. The 6 year old is still in a 5 point harness so she frequently comes in last. And cries about it. So the rest of us take our time to make things more fair.

Nikki said...

Haha - the beagle. I so crakced up because my Yorkie "Hammy" is always in the race for first. Of all my kids - he is the one that doesn't talk back, so he usually wins.

{leah} said...

The boys don't climb to be first in this house. But we nearly have WWIII when I bring the orange bowl out of the cupboard. One {orange}bowl and 3 boys doesn't add up.

Holly said...

The problem is that we encourage our youngest, the 4 year old, to race. She will fight about anything having to get done (jammies, seat belts, clothes on, etc) until we make it a "mom has to get her coat on, can you get your boots on faster?" kind of deal. So, as Tattooed Midget pointed out, she wants to be the middle UNLESS she can be the first! It's exhausting.

Lydia said...

We have a red bowl. Apparently the blue, orange, yellow, green bowls are not clean enough. The red bowl is the ONLY bowl that is acceptable to eat out of. My boy fight to the death for it. The fight has gone so far as the loser waiting for the winner to eat, then reusing the special bowl to eat his meal. Give me a break!

Shell said...

Read the book "Me First" by Helen Lester to your children. It is so funny and reminds my kids being first is not always best.

Audrey Hammer said...

Are you kidding? The two in school will cry if they're not first to the car when I pick them up. And even the baby gets upset if he's not the first to the front door when it's time to go somewhere. They all have to be first for EVERYTHING: pushing elevator buttons, getting served lunch/dinner, getting a bath, etc.

I have four, ages 9 to 21 months. I think I get meaner each day.

Cami said...

Hmmm. My NINETEEN year old son has an obsession with being first, best, biggest, strongest....etc. He LOVES to remind my competitive nine year old son over and over of these things. It all starts out, nineteen year old: Wanna play Wii? Nine year old: Okay. Nineteen year old: Gotta be the first one downstairs! as he leaps across the living room leaving my nine year old, legs churning, screaming madly, tearing off behind him! Thus, ensues 1/2 hour of howling and fighting before the Wii game ever happens. I keep trying to tell my nine year old what I learned a hundred years ago when I was his age: First the worst, second the same, last the best of all the game! He glares at me. "Yeah right. And you can be Santa if you fall off a roof!" I give. :)